guacamole mom

if you love the feeling of standing in bowl of guac, you will enjoy this...

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

I heard the professor for Cucumber 101 can be a pickle... Happy colleging!✏️

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

this year, vote for the candidate who will really change the world

endorsed by Obama: cucumber 2016

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

When she says she only dates cucumbers

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

Me: I would like to return this...

Cashier: sir this is an old man....

Me:

Cashier:

Me: grabs scanner and scans grandpa's forehead

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

This is a beautiful day to shred a cucumber

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

Guacamole is love, guacamole is life

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

"I'm proud to be a cucumber where at least I know I'm green"🎶

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

I once asked a woman for candy and she dropped a cucumber plant into my eyeball

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

trick or guac

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

this year I decided to dress up REAL scary and go as guacamole WITHOUT any garlic!!!

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

guacamol-AYYYYY

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

guac
a mole
guac guac
a mole

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

peel the avocado

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

whenever I feel down I remember that at least this woman appreciates me as much as I deserve 💚 https://t.co/3FTtOXeZ3l

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

RT if u r a cucumber-American

[Avocado @avocadofact]

who would you rather have in office? rt for an avocado. fav for donald trump.

[Dāvid @BumbleDC]

Apparently my beat poetry reading was too "politically hostile" & "overtly sexual" for this particular kindergarten but there'll be others.

[Rock @TheMichaelRock]

Look, gas station dude. Show me the sign that says I can't wash my entire car with the squeegee and I'll leave.

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

#CucumberWins http://t.co/gOup4yl9Eq

[guacamole mom @funcucumbers]

I never thought the day would come when I would have to sacrifice my mom for a cheese stick... Yet here it is