gapingbadger

We don't need no stinky badgers.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

Everyone will experience a Mcdonalds french fry fart.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

If you play butt finger puppets with eight mexicans behind Buffalo Wild WIngs you are a really big fucking ho.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

If your anal beads are the size of your neck you may be a ho.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

If your cum rag is a giant kitchen sponge... you're a ho.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

So there are two girls, a llama, Ted Danson (who is really a cow) and a cup. I'm not sure how this conversation got to this point.

[Faisal A... @notfaizzy]

Been running for the past hour; dunno why, I just saw 5 guys running & I took off. Hope they catch up & tell me why... Being black is tough.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

Just starred in a new vegan porn "Two Girls One Hummus Plate".

[Jim Gaffigan @JimGaffigan]

It's strange how many babies go for the skinhead look.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

A good way to break the ice on date is with a good period blood joke. Well, it can go either way.

[Phil McCrakin @fakescialmedia]

For those of you wondering, I prayed the gay away a long time ago. But sometimes I do microwave yogurt and throw it on my back.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

It smells like there was a felching festival in my car.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

My body has a natural way of telling me to slow down. It's called BILE.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

Just puked up crab night casino buffet all over my car because my friend was telling me about felching.

[Desolation of Smug @IngestMyBabies]

Real men hit bongs, not women.

[Enrique Shockwave @UNDEADTRESOR]

The best way to get over someone is to use a trampoline.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

Cashews kind of look like they have a half chub.

[b. @bwebster76]

This one goes out to the 5 people who star my shit.

[gapingbadger @gapingbadger]

Let's be real guys, squirters are just one trick ponies.