GASmtg

Your home of MTG satire, pithy quips and good advice. Cowards cannot block warriors.

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

Me, when my opp mulls to 5: Ugh, that sucks buddy
Also me: mull to 4 you piece of shit

[Tedaboy @TedaboyMTG]

how will this affect lebron's legacy?

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

Yellowhatatouille @gabnassif

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

scandal in paris: hall of famer's achievements questioned after intelligent rat found to be controlling his movements from underneath his eponymous yellow hat

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

Vaxxed?

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

@cumpleat No, they said they wouldn’t “this turn”. Besides, the TO announced all prizes very clearly at the start of the event.

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

scandal in paris: hall of famer's achievements questioned after intelligent rat found to be controlling his movements from underneath his eponymous yellow hat

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

*attacking with my UW commander into open mana when I know my opponent has removal*
“Do you Condemn Hama?”

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

Normalise these things but for deck notes

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

Tell me you’re playing Tron without telling me you’re playing Tron. #mtg #PTLOTR

[University of Oxford @UniofOxford]

Our Oxford Word of the Week from @engfac's Prof @SCPHorobin:

Mulling: darling, sweetheart

#OxfordWOTW

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

5 years meticulous work, I wipe the sweat off my brow and unveil unto you my masterpiece: Every masc MTG character in DSO (dick size order). "But is it in descending or ascending order?" you ask, hungry, desperate to know. I smile, chuckle softly to myself, I'll never tell...

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

I cherish the moment before the fan art fully loads, will Jace have a gargantuan member or something more elegant? Pure opportunity and bliss, anything is possible. This is why Schrodinger risked it all.

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

What’s a battle? #MTGMOM

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

We’re always saying stuff like that.

[Patrick Sullivan @BasicMountain]

@bmkibler @DjMaffiXD @drewlevin @ModeratelyMtg the original "this is just how the game works" template

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

@cumpleat Secret Lair: JO Material, when?

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

"Oh yea well could a virgin do this!"
*I try to flip dramatically through my 'for trade' folder but every page with a female character or sexy bear is stuck together*

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

"am I a tits or an ass man?" *I swirl my bordeaux glass which is full to the brim with ribena*
"well actually I prefer art" (magic the gathering art with huge tits in it)

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

put my symptoms into web md and it said I'm a brewer (who has debilitating diarrhea)

[cumpleat @cumpleat]

Look wotc, if you are going to keep making your planes walkers fucking shredded then I am going to keep jacking off to them. And yes, sometimes that will be in stores.

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

🚨 ANNOUNCEMENT 🚨

Lurrus of the Dream Den has been banned in Tiny Leader.

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

@wizards_magic Jealous?

[GASmtg @gasmtg]

If we were in charge of the missed trigger rules, both players would be responsible for maintaining a proper game state in all instances, except for new Day/Night interactions. We’re willing to turn a blind eye there.