HowlingSponge

porous/freak

[HowlingAdulterer @HowlingAdultery]

Woke up sore this morning. Asked the Bull if he had any cream for coffee. He said yes but as I started for the fridge, he grabbed me by my wrist and stopped me. He squeezed his BBC and said “this your creamery, nigga.” My knees start to tremble.

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

RT @howlingted: Get busy living it get busy dying I say to myself before I watch porn for 12 hours and gamble my son's cancer fund at the c…

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

When you been playing the gay best friend role for too long and she starts mentioning all of her past rapists and you gotta act like those aren’t your intentions too

[HowlingAnderz @HowlingAnderzin]

Flexed my glow-up on my highschool heartbreak just to get called a limp dick loser while her mixed-race husband is now DMing me pictures of my house.

[HowlingBateman2 @HowlingBateman2]

Love my fans

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

Was just watching porn and it accidentally connected to my bluetooth speaker at max volume and likely woke up my entire apartment complex but I don’t think it matters much considering any of us living here can be near a school anyways

[HowlingBateman2 @HowlingBateman2]

Wasn’t aware my black friend’s toilet didn’t work. Had to go so dropped one tiny ball of shit before hearing “aye nigga don’t be shittin!” Almost tossed it out the window but told his fat sister who replied “oh my gawd you shit a mf tiny ball nigga you don’t be shittin right!”

[HowlingAnderz @HowlingAnderzin]

Pretending to be fast asleep after guessing her passcode wrong so many times her iPhone locks for 400 years

[HowlingRH Productions Ltd. @browasright]

This how black folks walk when White folks ain't around

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

@Howlingmutant0 @SydneyEnjoyers Thought it was going to be a picture of Jshock. I suppose this works as well..

[HowlingKanye @HowlingKanye]

Ten bucks says Charlie came to her in a dream and broke the case wide open (again).

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

Her PH balance is all out of wack and she keeps begging to put the seat warmers on but I can’t risk my wife’s car smelling like rotten tilapia

[HowlingAnderz @HowlingAnderzin]

I'm a gentleman. Even when I don't feel like it or consent, I will perform oral sex on a woman, and after each lick I say "oh wow, that's money" while I violently dry heave. Then after the deed is done, and with my face covered in a disrupted pH balance, I'll tip my cap and say "that sure was delectable" before I uncontrollably vomit.

[Sleazy @wiggakingIV]

Me at the rap battle:

"You said you gon run up in my crib w/the 9?

But u ain't stop that n1gga from cummin up in your ribs when you was 9!"

I pulls out the police report from when my opponent got r@ped by his moms bf & throw it at him. The crowd go wild. Sleazy wins again.

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

They’re doing this to me at work right now

[HowlingSponge @HowlingSponge]

The kinda shit your uncle pulls on you when he’s 9 beers deep and you thought you could trust him in confidence about wanting to transition genders

[Evil HowlingTed @howlingted]

You ever be sucking on some pussy and wish it was dick?