yup yup

can't doom blade it dude, hexproof

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

me: can i get a burger ($5.99) with fries ($1.99) and a soda ($1.49)

cashier: sure that’ll be $25

me: ok

[👑ℂℍ𝔸𝕆𝕊𝕂𝕀𝔻👑 @DatChaosGuy]

Spider-Man fans when they see a black man

[insane freak guy @Beer_Pisser]

Wouldn't change shit for us true believers. We already know that he's real due to our faith.

[Derek Heckman @herekdeckman]

“And it appears that…yes…he and his friends are…killing the alien with hammers”

[丂Ҝㄖㄖ爪卂 @Skooma_Beast]

Good night

[Sage @sagebored]

Jerry: She has a penis?

George: She had a PENIS, Jerry!

Elaine: So what if she had a penis?

(Kramer enters)

Elaine: Kramer, would you ever date a girl with a penis?

Kramer: I only date girls with penises

George: Really? Why?

Kramer: She knows her way around the equipment

[Alura 🏳️‍🌈 @Aluratisse]

Ozempic culture has gone too far

[𝐋𝐞𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝 @Be_like_legend]

its crazy how if you get good grades they just let you raw dog adhd your whole life

[julia @juumelo_]

when a white boy asks you to put sunscreen on him that’s a sign of great respect in their culture

[fitlit @deathbysalesman]

I was trying to use a straight razor to shave "down there" and ended up cutting my penis clean in half. So I'm going to be, maybe. 15 minutes late,

[Anakin Skywanker @justpearthings]

Dick too fat doctor had me taking girth control pills

[Shaun Johnson @ShyBucketGetter]

Guy from high school who died in 2021 just posted the Knicks on his story

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

Must feel so amazing right now to be a Vietnamese man in NYC named Nicks Nguyen and hearing the whole city chant your name

[cowboy @nextokens]

guy who faked-it-until-he-made-it but was starting to get in over his head can’t believe his luck when llms launched

[jeffrey @JeffScape]

Job interviewer asked about my biggest weakness and I looked him in the eyes and whimpered “you”

[Domino's Pizza UK @Dominos_UK]

miss her

[Tarshit 🕸️🕷️ @tarshit_r]

Generation Z is preferring Spider-Man instead of having sex

[Shmegmoid Johnson @shmegmoid]

With $1T ($1,000,000,000,000 USD)

Elon Musk could:

- Jack me off fucking crazy style

- Go gorilla mode on my shii

- Fuck me crazy retardo mode

- Go sloppy toppy all over my freak ass tard dick

- Walk in on my dad naked n start fuckin on him

- Piss in his own face (like a retard)

It’s the Trillionaire grindset. Get with it or kill yourself.

[Hana 🧡 @HanaHoops]

This is deadass the funniest video I’ve ever seen

[wire mother @poisonjr]

ME: It's okay for me to be smoking weed because I don't have any kids.

PLUG: Why do you always buckle up in here dude. We're never gonna move nowhere