Uncle Sam

The horizon is so shy it doesn’t want to meet you.

[Uncle Sam @igochesam]

@iam_polymath @fiifiOBJ It’s all in the passé simple

[Torren @Torren__]

Vas a la cocina a por una cerveza y de repente el comentarista empieza a hablar más alto.

[Field Marshal of the Han Dynasty @General_Oluchi]

Three years later, we can see that the monkeys that snatched the car key from the owner are still unable to drive it. The car is still where the owner left it.

[Uncle Sam @igochesam]

@luca_varan @grok Mais la place des femmes c’est dans la cuisine…

[TAHYOR 👑- 36- @eyitayojay]

If your club no win treble this season, no follow me talk abeg.

[Vini’s Old Chin @_vimzzzz]

But it’s me who must write ielts

[Uncle Sam @igochesam]

@MsNeroEfe Hi. I need a copy.

[u. @90ffps]

just got off the phone with my brother gushing about everything happening in space. it's such a special moment for us because we were both kids obsessed with the sky and space, stars and clouds. so much that his entire dream for years was becoming an astronaut.

[Jonathan @Jonny_artist]

I'm currently the furthest I've ever been from Artemis II

[Adam Aaronson @aaaronson]

"Eight billion" is the second whole number alphabetically

[World of Engineering @engineers_feed]

log(😅) =💧log(😄)

[kaz ☄️ @qasmokez]

sugar daddy: im gonna spoil you
salt daddy: im gonna preserve you

[Sridhar Ramesh @RadishHarmers]

When cartoon characters discuss numbers in base ten rather than base eight, it takes me completely out of my suspension of disbelief. Their society would not have developed that way.

[Elijah the Middleborne @TheMiddleborne]

“You brood of vipers”
- Jesus
“White-washed tombs”
- Jesus
“Children of Hell/Satan”
- Jesus
“Worse than Sodom”
- Jesus

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Pope Urges Jesus And Satan To Put All Their Differences Aside In The Name Of Peace https://t.co/yvx0WY9Oje

[Panashe @NasheCeezet_zw]

it's our first time on earth so why are you a life coach?????

[Uncle Sam @igochesam]

@CNviolations Theresa

[Ndi Kato (Ungwan Masara's finest) @YarKafanchan]

Control your own anger. You are a woman not a wild animal.

[Equivocator™ @Oluwanonso_Esq]

I’ve done my genotype test several times in Nigeria: always AS, consistent with my family medical tree.

A mutual once told me she tested AS multiple times in Nigeria, but after moving to the EU, her test came back AA. She reconfirmed thrice - still AA. She was furious that Nigerian labs had labelled her wrong all along, costing her marriage prospects.

So, armed with this information, I decided to recheck my own genotype in Europe.

Ladies and gentlemen, you wouldn’t believe it — my result came back… AS.

Nigerian doctors were right. No miracle here for me 😭😭