Austin Witt

My non-professionally related account so I don’t bore my friends with healthcare stuff and my soap boxes.

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@Volzzzzzzzxz

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@catdaddyaddie Go to a Family Physician that does general practice and women’s health.

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@stebertstebert Okay but what about the hospital?

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@MaseManDPT On the contrary, they created physics. He has total control of it

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@maggiemarks91

[Dolly Parton @DollyParton]

Monday Mood

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@Austin_White11

[Lin-Manuel Miranda @Lin_Manuel]

*affects ketchup caviar obtaining voice*
Hi @Twitter, Stage’s Lin Miranda here. Can we do something about this #VerifyNWalks

[Smokey Vol @theSmokeyVol]

Crying is only acceptable at funerals, the Grand Canyon, and Admiral Schofield’s senior night.

[chuck degroat @chuckdegroat]

Transfiguration Sunday comes right before Ash Wednesday, Reminds me of Rabbi Bunim's words - Keep two pieces of paper in pockets at all times. One - "I am a speck of dust." The other - "The world was created for me." We are loved and limited. Holy and human. Dignified and dust.

[ilona burton @ilonacatherine]

Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s Fluoxetine.

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@LukeBuchananana @SheaSerrano Shea is a cool 6’2 get outta here

[Nathan Brooks @brooksnathan]

My fiancé thinks I'm the only person that does this so let's see:

RT... if you bang your straw violently on a flat surface until the end pokes through the paper and then pull it out

LIKE... if you tear the end off with your fingers and pull the straw out, no violence

[Stephanie Beatriz @iamstephbeatz]

Hi. I’m so excited to tweet w y’all tomorrow. Did you know that when you actually use #Brooklyn99 it has positive repercussions for the life of our show? OH THATS RIGHT YOU DID KNOW CUZ U DID THAT THING WHERE YOU SAVED OUR SHOW THAT TIME anyway c u tomorrow

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@carisconner We truly don’t deserve her

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@OfficialDTCB Yes on Peaky

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@syd_davis14 @coachtee17 I like to think without you and @Travis_Davis this doesn’t happen. Well done good and faithful

[Cut4 @Cut4]

Guys, we're just trying to see how many RTs this Bartolo egg can get.

[Austin Witt @iwittnessreport]

@devonaccardi *fun