cutmoney

You come at the king, you best not miss.

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@GivnerAriel @entylawyer This same Steve used 9,047 separate accounts to make 313,528 Hamilton ticket orders over the course of 20 months, and paid $3.35 million to settle charges that the company was able to buy 1,012 tickets to a U2 concert in one minute. @ScottFriedman3

https://t.co/lA4mvRa4QU

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@darrenrovell This same Steve used 9,047 separate accounts to make 313,528 Hamilton ticket orders over the course of 20 months, and paid a $3.35 million to settle charges that the company was able to buy 1,012 tickets to a U2 concert in one minute. @ScottFriedman3

https://t.co/lA4mvRa4QU

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@GivnerAriel @darrenrovell This same Steve used 9,047 separate accounts to make 313,528 Hamilton ticket orders over the course of 20 months, and paid a $3.35 million to settle charges that the company was able to buy 1,012 tickets to a U2 concert in one minute. Post this suit too👇

https://t.co/GloypSrQAT

[cutmoney @jcutmoney]

@MSplit98 Epic

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@WashProbs Glover Park

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@DMVAdventures This looks like the Sheraton Hotel logo in which case it’s pretty customary for them and other hotel chains to automatically include a service charge..

[cutmoney @jcutmoney]

@dave_wakeman @mjguff @MarkGressJr “No officer, I wasn’t robbing. I was at the sportsbiz conference with the rest of them.”

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[cutmoney @jcutmoney]

@doitbigchicago @Nike Love the holiday AM90 from 2020 and always get a compliment when we wear them annually from Dec 1st - 26th.

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@supremegoddddd @nikestore @Nike Ordered that hoodie and they sent this which isn’t even on the site..

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@LasVegasFill Comes out still quacking.. 🦆

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@providence_chef @bizarchive 🤞 we do, but if not, here’s a small consolation..

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C’mon @Nike I might be a peak dad, but I’m not that old.. #AirMonarch #FathersDay

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@ConshyBakery And this guy’s been here since The Spectrum days.. @kylefrankel @jamiesnider

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@NoahCoslov These past 4 years of The Follow Up have brought many of us great joy and tears too, let alone this 40 seconds.. happy anniversary to the podcast and congrats!

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@UltraDane @doitbigchicago I see you in Row 1..

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@themichaelhicke How much money did you make from the 21M views on TikTok?

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Is it criminal or good marketing that Foot Locker charges $49.99 on https://t.co/p8Ot4S5Uzs and $70.00 for the same exact kids Jordan on https://t.co/anSFS4tbqs? @doitbigchicago @Raphkicks

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@doitbigchicago Mitsubishi’s 🤣

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@vegasstarfish @PRyanTexas - you’ve been seen..