Jill Holmes

[Jill Holmes @jillholmes79]

@DarealHickster I’ve cube??

[Jill Holmes @jillholmes79]

An older woman at the grocery store just asked who she could complain to about why they can’t make writing checks easier, cuz it wastes everyone’s time... That would be you. Complain to yourself for writing that check, lady.

[Brooke Thomas @BrookeOnAir]

This is amazing and is now my favorite sport. https://t.co/Oc9NuWQr7H

[Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats]

Thrilled I bought a 55" screen so I can listen to it while I stare at a 4" screen.

[Jess Dweck @TheDweck]

When your toddler refuses to use the potty and just wants to keep shitting in his own pants

[Josh Constine 📶🔥 @JoshConstine]

Y’all like science/witchcraft? https://t.co/Kdt4AQkd8R

[Comfortably Smug @ComfortablySmug]

While you're sitting here nervous, watching to see if Facebook knows which Disney Princess you are, Bezos has Alexa audio recording everything happening in the room.

[Brady Trettenero @BradyTrett]

Hilarious post-game interview from 36-year-old Scott Foster, who was called into action as the Blackhawks Emergency Backup Goaltender tonight

[Chase Mitchell @ChaseMit]

Guard: You there, identify yourself!
DJ Khaled: This is the moment I’ve been training for

[Jill Holmes @jillholmes79]

What I like to call a bus. https://t.co/cMJ8bOluKu

[FOX 2 Detroit @FOX2News]

The latest variation of Uber will require a short walk. Once linked, riders would need to walk a couple of blocks to be picked up at a common location. They also would be dropped off at a site that would be a short walk from their final destinations. https://t.co/y9MTFzIZ7R

[Mark Hamill @MarkHamill]

Congratulations, sir! This dignified, statesman-like tweet is the perfect way to counter the book's narrative that you're an impulsive, childish dimwit. https://t.co/VW1uzqu5pr

[BabyCenter @BabyCenter]

5 things every mom thinks at Target but is afraid to admit https://t.co/tKfQFuFKrP #babycenterblog

[Peter Alexander @PeterAlexander]

You can’t make this stuff up: Trump held Hanukkah celebration tonight, five days early, ahead of his Mar-a-Lago getaway. 👇 https://t.co/qydAOYUlxc

[DaveHolmes.bsky.social @DaveHolmes]

How about this: if you have signed a high school yearbook over the age of 18, get the fuck out of here.

[Megan Amram @meganamram]

You're telling me these people were in a CHURCH -- the EPICENTER of thoughts & prayers -- and they STILL weren't safe from guns?

[David Wolf @DavidJWolf_]

Thanks Huffington Post for publishing my article https://t.co/FDLabSQNqK. #oncollaborative

[Jill Holmes @jillsellsholmes]

BEAUTIFUL 2 BED 1 BATH CONDO WITH UNBEATABLE PRICE! THIS FIRST FLOOR UNIT BOASTS A SPACIOUS LIVING ... https://t.co/A0S0sYWPtw

[Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman]

THIS THIS THIS THIS https://t.co/Bh94DMSARm

[mike ginn @shutupmikeginn]

Gonna need you to finish your story real quick so i can tell you how the same thing happened to me, but its more interesting cause i’m in it