Joe Law Rinse

Mt. Fiji will always have my heart

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Have fun, speak nonsense
Lie fizz shore tin the end

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Every spring when it starts warming up I involuntarily cosplay as someone who’s never seen warm weather

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

@gatlin_sanders Yes! Or the street food from around the world

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Someone hire me to make a music video for them. I’ve got a couple ideas that I think would be really popular on YouTube. Picture this, your song played over video of a couple Indian guys digging a pool. Or accompanying a makeup tutorial. Or a mukbang

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Mary: *looking at her newborn child* we’ll call him Jesus

Joseph: *tears in his eyes* Jeez for short

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

What if our whole lives have just been our personal backstories for an immersive simulation multiplayer horror video game called 2020???

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

If I was king my first decree would be “Henceforth all video game consoles shall be called ‘Rocket League machines.’”

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

The GoDaddy PR team have really changed direction since we were kids

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Y’all think Elrond and Gandalf allowed Sam, Merry, and Pippin to go on the trip just so they had a few backup ringbearers?

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

And that’s before you even start on the hypnosis and MKUltra shit going on in Lake Laogai

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

I’m rewatching Avatar like everyone else, and really just marveling at how well they showed a bunch of kids how creepy and falsely-led a government can be. The earth king not only didn’t make any decisions about the war, he didn’t even know about it

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

@blade_funner Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Do you think Australians think that Americans and British people sound the same?

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

Our victory tonight is the beginning of the end for Donald Trump.

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

These people say that senators boycotting the State if the Union is “inappropriate” but don’t see a problem holding a trial with no witnesses.

[Jonathan Turley @JonathanTurley]

The facial expressions and head shaking is a new low for the House. Moreover, the protests of members was incredibly inappropriate. A president speaks at the SOTU as a guest of both houses. . . .

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Netflix getting crazy with their marketing for this new Pandemic show

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

Bob Ross had accident
And yet he made it right
You’d never know he never meant
To paint the sun at night

But when I have accidents
They say it’s gross and sad
And order me to burn my pants
Because they smell so bad

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

A coworker told me that McDonald’s holiday pies are “life-changing” and I was like “yea sure.” Today I had one, and I don’t recommend it. I’m already trying to rationalize how I can go get another later. I could see this being a problem.

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

I don’t need a coat closet I have a car

[Joe Law Rinse @joeykip]

I’ll never not be tempted to watch triple D. Let him take me to flavortown 🧂🏙