The DevOps Guy

All things DevOps and Cloud. Learning, building, breaking stuff, documenting the journey.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Every monitoring dashboard starts as 'we'll keep it simple' and ends as the cockpit of a Boeing 747.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

We call it 'infrastructure as code' but really it's 'infrastructure as someone else's abandoned pull request.'

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

@hxncho759058 Totally feel this! That’s why I tend to push my projects on DigitalOcean. Much better and predictable pricing compared to other major cloud providers lol

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

We moved to the cloud to save money. Our AWS bill is now higher than the salary of the person who suggested it.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Accidentally exposed our staging database to the internet for 3 weeks. Found out because a security scanner we also forgot to set up told us.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

@TTrimoreau after the ipo, all anthropic engineers will be centi millionaires

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Somewhere right now, a senior engineer is explaining to a junior why the production fix is worse than the bug it fixed.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

@PayPal @Revolut @Wise well deserved @paypal just give up already

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

I'm convinced that @paypal should not exist anymore, there's literary no benefit of using it. companies like @Revolut and @Wise are so good now that PayPal should just close shop

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

@jackfriks i did both hah, move my infra to digitalocean and started focusing on seo

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Our 'quick database migration' is now in hour 14. The DBA has gone silent. I think we lost him.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Our 'quick 5-minute deploy' turned into a 6-hour incident because someone forgot to update the config map.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

The gap between 'it works locally' and 'it works in production' is measured in coffee cups and broken dreams.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Our load test brought down the monitoring system. So technically we passed because nobody could see the failures.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

The best documentation is the Slack message you can't find anymore.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Upgraded Kubernetes by one minor version. Only 11 things broke. That's actually a personal best.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

@Rainmaker1973 some lazy person did this study

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

Article from 2016:
> Elon Musk said SpaceX plans to send people to Mars in 2024 for a 2025 arrival

https://t.co/XNiMipJwCy

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

DevOps is the only job where being on fire is a metaphor and also sometimes literal.

[The DevOps Guy @justdevopsguy]

The post-mortem for our last outage was longer than the outage itself. Some say the meeting is still going.