Aidan Beasley

he/him • registered scuzzbucket

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Had a dream I was in One Direction and they all hated my fucking guts

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Just spent exactly $7.11 at 7/11 and waited 10 minutes for confetti to fall from the ceiling

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Coolest* guy at this party*

*Only
*Bus Stop

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

roommates and I spending this evening tearing Longlegs apart

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

@NewRockstars every project marvel does is just 3 hours of waiting for the main character to finally wear a suit that they’ll never wear again

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

They should make a phone you can bring on a rollercoaster

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

I heard Big Bird was almost in that new tennis movie

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Whats a place like girl doing in a you like this? *passes out*

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Hey @WWE we need to cool it with the advertising

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

I am somehow the only normal person in every McDonald’s I go to

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Today’s NYT Connections caused upwards of 2 hours of tension in my house tonight

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Me in the theater watching Madame Web: So when does she Morb on them

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

She grit on my shrimp till I put a baby in her king cake

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Shout out to my upstairs neighbors who have decided that 3 am is the perfect time to test which baseball is the bounciest or something

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

got my first set of thermal underwear today. we need to normalize leggings for men.

[Avatar: The Last Airbender @AvatarNetflix]

Meet June, a bounty hunter from the Earth Kingdom. #AvatarTheLastAirbender

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

A Christmas Carol is crazy the grim reaper tells Scrooge “John says he doesn’t like you” and he gets so upset he cures Tiny Tim’s leg or whatever

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

I’m just saying I would ask for a thorough evaluation of my pregnant wife’s health before investing in bronze baby shoes

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

Every Tesla looks like Voldemort

[Aidan Beasley @king___beasley]

@_denisesalcedo