Adam Lefkowitz

[John Fadule @fadule_]

Life is amazing:

-gyms exist
-Coke Zero exists
-hot girls outnumber even moderately put-together dudes 2000 to 1
-you and your wife can get hammered at a comedy show then smash all night without a condom
-you and your friends can hit the gym then smoke a joint and grill cheeseburgers
-iPhones have GPS and it tells you when there’s a cop so you can slow down and avoid a speeding ticket
-you could be working 16 hour days in a coal mine in a third world country

There are people who live in wheelchairs. There are kids born with disabilities. No Prom, no Shoulder Presses, no sleepovers with their best friends staying up til 2AM watching Interstellar.

And you’re not SMASHING the gym like a GRATEFUL SAVAGE!? Eating healthy 90% of the time, calling your friends for no reason, booking the trip, CRUSHING IT at work, ASKING for the raise!? Asking out your crush making her your girlfriend then your wife!?

You’re spinning on a sphere in an infinite universe and the fact you’re alive is a 1 in 500 trillion miracle - you’re so lucky it’s absurd and you have nothing to lose :)

[Bill Ackman @BillAckman]

This could be the most pathetic reporting I have seen. The reporter calls the daycare centers to ask them if they are legitimate. I kid you not. How is this supposed to determine whether fraud is taking place? Are they expecting the centers to say ‘Yes. We are committing fraud.’

Six of seven don’t even answer the phone.

The media has and continues to fail us.

[David Sacks @DavidSacks]

As a response to socialism, Miami will replace NYC as the finance capital and Austin will replace SF as the tech capital.

[The Patriot Oasis™ @ThePatriotOasis]

🚨BREAKING: President Trump reveals a PATRIOT wrote him a CHECK for $130,000,000 MILLION DOLLARS to help pay our military during the Democrat shutdown.

"Today he sent us a check for $130 million."

"He doesn't really want the recognition—That is what I call it PATRIOTISM!"

[internet hall of fame @InternetH0F]

You know you've achieved everything in life when your childhood idol compliments you like that

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

TO MY GREAT FELLOW AMERICANS…

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

RIP Charlie Kirk. It doesn’t matter what your opinion is of Charlie or his politics if you don’t view this as one of the darkest days in American history than you are part of the problem.

[benja @benjaminakar]

depression is often just:
- no gym
- no sleep
- bad food
- too much phone
- zero purpose

[@jason @Jason]

This can’t be real…. Can it?!

[david friedberg @friedberg]

free speech. but we’ll shoot you.
something is deeply broken in the west. if we don’t fix it, eventually everyone could be ushered at gunpoint to sign the proclamations of the Truth Ministers.

[MrBeast @MrBeast]

Me - I raised $12M to get hundreds of thousands of people clean water and save countless people from dying! 🥰

Twitter - MrBeast is evil

[Justin Bieber @justinbieber]

Theres no way around love island not entering the chat 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Just left the @Tesla design studio.

Most epic demo ever by end of year.

Ever.

[chichi🐣 @aixchichi]

the narrator saying that chris and pepe’s most viewed basketball game is on love island is so sick lol #LoveIslandUSA

[Jaz 𖦹𓈒⋆ @Jamaisjaz]

Ace the more you mind your business and worry about your own relationship the more I start to like you #LoveIslandUSA

[shantae is seeing bts TODAY @fooI4tae]

pepe actually needs to be studied in a lab bc he has now had TWO women who were practically in love with another man forgetting about them within 24 hours #LoveIslandUSA

[Orange Book 🍊📖 @orangebook]

Long-lasting relationships are never forced, they happen serendipitously, they involve people who are not trying to change each other, they don't require constant maintenance, both sides feel lucky they met each other, both sides are growing independently in a similar direction.

[dinosaur @dinosaurs1969]

cocaine is a better networking tool than linkedin could ever dream of being