M

USE YOUR TITS

[M @lewameat]

All of this gay pornography on my timeline makes me think I like man on man sex.

[optimus crime @deannajmo_]

I think we moved on too quickly from Kristi Noem’s husband wearing giant fake titties

[Arslan @thega1nz]

When his meat is smaller than you anticipated but you’ve already made the trip with these gas prices

[M @lewameat]

Does anyone know what cyclospora tastes like??

[Mike Abrusci @mikeabrusci]

I bet it would feel awesome to force him to eat a bowl of dog food at gunpoint

[evan loves worf @esjesjesj]

She’s acting like she just fell out of a coconut tree

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

“Homeschooling is trickle-down stupidity.” — Jennifer Welch

She fucking nailed it.

[The Internet Fish @TheInternetFish]

"I'M FUCKINGGGG RICHHHHHH"

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Conservatives when they find out kids are getting free lunch at school.

[DarkWokeBalthazar @rebonsible]

But if you blame all white people for slavery they get really mad

[M @lewameat]

Men really think they’re clever when I set them up for a joke that I know they’ll make.

[Keith @nagy_minaj]

Odysseus returning to Ithaca

[LizaMinnelliOutlives @LiZaOutlives]

Liza Minnelli has outlived Senator Lindsey Graham. He has gone to the big closet in the sky.

[Nate Bear @NateB_Panic]

A rocket hasn't been fired from Gaza in 18 months. And Hamas has handed administrative control over to a technocratic interim committee. Yet the apartheid state continues killing children daily. Almost as if it's a holocaust and not a war

[Jay Jurden @JayJurden]

These titties ain’t big enough for the both of us

[Ariana Jasmine @arianajasmine__]

Tell me a vegetable you don’t like, I’ll go first: Mitch McConnell

[iamhunkydory @itschergurl]

The conversation:

[Sarah Ironside 💙 @SarahIronside6]

I spoke with my dear friend Mitch McConnell for 20 minutes this morning and he told me he supports universal healthcare, free college, raising the minimum wage and housing for all.

[Victims of Capitalism Memorial Foundation @karaokecomputer]

To all who celebrate

[meredith @noyeahobviously]

Test your fucking coke you guys