Humphrey Ploughjogger

I'm a loner, Dottie, a rebel.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Thomas Tuchel really gonna make the whole world like Harry Maguire again

[Matt Carmichael @MttCarmichael]

love letter to 157 e ohio st...built 1911 and snuggled between the muck of ed debevic's and the magic of aritzia. first floor, sayat nova armenian restaurant; second floor, cash-only gay bar; third floor, i'm actually not sure what's up there now but it used to be psychic readings by natalie. what a lineup. streeterville's finest.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Some men just want to feel pain

[Zack Rosenblatt @ZackBlatt]

Cade Klubnik: "I woke up this morning hoping the Jets were going to pick me."

[StatMuse @statmuse]

Most 25/5/5 playoff games:

80 — LeBron after turning 30
75 — LeBron before turning 30
73 — Michael Jordan

[Jonas Čeika @Jonas_Ceika]

I sent ChatGPT an audio file of a series of FART sound effects and asked what it thinks of "my music" and this is what it said

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Ah, yes. The perfect voice for podcasting.

[Secretary Kennedy @SecKennedy]

Coming soon—The Secretary Kennedy Podcast.

[Justin🦩Boldaji @justinboldaji]

Telling everyone how impressive my first gay bareback orgy was

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

And this is why nobody wants to go to Vegas anymore

[Las Vegas Locally 🌴 @LasVegasLocally]

Vegas pit bosses are tired of $5 blackjack players

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Sarah Strong? More like Sarah Strong amirite!?

[Paul Robertson 🇺🇸 @ShadeSalvo]

Video shows UCONN player, Sarah Strong, ripping her own jersey after missing shot 😂🤣😂

#UCONN 5️⃣1️⃣
#SouthCarolina 4️⃣4️⃣

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Holy fuck I would give all my money to anyone to ask trump to do this right now

[Acyn @Acyn]

RFK JR: One time, Trump grabbed a placemat, turned it over, took a Sharpie, and drew a perfect map of the Middle East. Then he marked the troop strength of every country along each border on that map..

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

How about now

[Nebraska Public Media News @NebPubMediaNews]

Lincoln's Railyard is packed with fans loving the start to the Nebraska-Iowa game. Nebraska is up 25-17 in the NCAA Tournament.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Ope

[Florida Gators 🐊🔥 @gatorsszn]

We might beat Iowa by 35 I’m ngl 😭

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Yeah that's the question, this is the type of performance we were expecting going into the season so where the fuck has it been?

[David Lynch @davidlynchlfc]

Galatasaray were always going to find it harder at Anfield, but Liverpool aggressively ensured that would be the case by putting on an almost Jurgen Klopp-style European performance. Wherever this intensity been all season, Arne Slot needs more of it between now and May.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

This is such a funny lie. Just - unintentionally hilarious.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

TRUMP: I've spoken to a certain president, who I like actually, a past president, he said, 'I wish I did it.' But they didn't do it. I'm doing it.

Q: Which president?

TRUMP: I can't tell you that. It would be very bad for his career even though he's got no career left.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

An absolutely appalling photo opp

[Chuck Grassley @ChuckGrassley]

2day was not easy especially for the Gold Star families Iowans are there for 1 another

I’m proud 2b w Nunn Miller-Meeks Reynolds Ernst Hinson & Feenstra to honor our fallen heroes in Dover Here w Army leaders incl Gen George who is from Hardin Co & I nominated for West Point

[Sean Davis @seanmdav]

THE inappropriate relationship

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Please stop doing this

[Chase Daniel @ChaseDaniel]

This was the end for DJ Moore in Chicago….Bills sure hope it’s better effort moving forward.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

Twitter's search function is completely broken. The "Top" function includes tweets from users with 50 followers but also tweets from 9 months ago. Impossible to find any relevant info on current events.

[Humphrey Ploughjogger @LikeAHawkStar]

What I don't get is why Lee Brice wants to kiss his fish so badly.