lydia lunchables

marissa

[lydia lunchables @lydialunchablez]

I never had an egg cream

[𒀭 aliyah @becomingidea]

incredible work from grok

[debbie @dm4uz3]

@musicwins1 you've gotta post the full sequence

[Robert (Durden) @realrobdurden]

What stage of Capitalism is it when CEOs die and everyone subsequently laughs their asses off??

[terminally onλine εngineer @tekbog]

you can say retarded at work now

[Joe — e/adgbe 🎸 @joe_r_Odonnell]

I heard they’re putting Aunt Jemima back on the bottle tomorrow

[Helvetica Hoochie @RebelleCunt]

"And a relationship with FLAVOR FLAV was the PRIZE"

[Zito @_Zeets]

We might be cooked

[Cybershell @Cybershell]

This section of Jim Carrey's wikipedia article cracks me up

[cj @futurevictim_]

the only lasting 9/11 memory i have is when the budweiser ad with the kneeling clydesdales came on during the super bowl and i said "those horses are praying to mecca" and my friend's uncle got so mad that he had to go in the backyard

[Fearghas Kelly @FearghasKelly]

I better go superviral for this...

[BrooklynVegan @brooklynvegan]

Chicago renames street "Steve Albini Way" https://t.co/GwMzm3v6ye

[Mike Scollins @mikescollins]

"Stop calling us weird!!"

[wint @dril]

i deserve th e most mentally ill president imaginable. 99 year old babbling doofus. Send us into the volcano sir

[habitual line-stepper @alaskastardust]

yeah it’s called when my wife and I stop somewhere and get two sandwiches but we swap halves so each of us gets to try two different sandwiches