matt jacobs

Building databases @GoogleCloud; @ApacheImpala PMC; Brown University

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

Successful first month at @GoogleCloud:
☑ ramped up
☑ building cool products
☑ embarrassed myself trying to talk to Sanjay Ghemawat in the microkitchen (but he was nice about it)

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@wesmckinn Undergraduate Algebra, Serge Lang (2005); Top review: "Not a great book." https://t.co/wH7qnfDHr8

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

👏👏👏 https://t.co/W4feM5kDtx

[Apache Impala @ApacheImpala]

We graduated! Congratulations and thanks to the whole community. https://t.co/XWMyv5tedf

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@isacatinthesink ?

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@GDF_X it's actually several characters https://t.co/IY2jgTDZcE

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

If they don't want stats, they don't want to go fast.

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@mannequinpussy woo! see y'all then

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@mannequinpussy but san francisco ??

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

First _upstream_ Apache Impala (incubating) release! https://t.co/XocXevaWMQ
woohoo @ApacheImpala

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@HenryR @jdcryans I wasn't going to attribute that quote. I just chuckled when I read it, and naturally I took it out of context.

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@mattjacobs a CPU is just an instruction executor, there’s nothing a CPU does that you can’t execute by hand.

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

lol "Impala is just a query layer, there's nothing that Impala does that you can't do by hand" says guy that works on storage

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

jerks trying to phish my iCloud act: why does your server crash when I send your scam web service millions fake passwords? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

magikarp is the worst #pokemon, guys don't even bother not worth a pokeball

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

"if it's in the SQL standard it must be useful"

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

first time that sql got me an invite to a pool party

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

"The Germans are multithreading"

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

template metaprogramming is the gentoo of programming paradigms

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@leifwalsh @TheAmyDance @jco @HenryR +1 the red book for databases

[matt jacobs @mattjacobs]

@jco @RealShrimpFacts fwiw I still highly recommend bruddah hutts bbq food truck, get the ribs