MaureenWheelz

Daniels mam. Lover of bicardi and pannini football stickers. 60% legless, 100% lethal.Looks like your nan. Swears like your dad.
Fold strategist.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

@fesshole I'd chop it off if ya were pissing in my sink love.
Bathroom fitter did that once, he's heads now on a spike to warn other tradies

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

@zhangyong02 Teeth to gum ratio = horse 🐎

[Daniel Melodrama @DMelodrama82819]

Retweet if you think the government are absolute douch bags

#thegreatbritishcull
#government
#health

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

@NoContextBrits Who the fuck turns “? years old”?
Someone hiding something.
Like a dodgy birth certificate, or a second family in Doncaster.

#Growuplove
#Ownthenumber

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

Might unfollow half if they post vegan sausage rolls or the word “hubby.”

Anyway. Back to shouting at the news and making tea strong enough to dissolve a spoon.

#MaureenSays #TrustTheFold

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

Because I’ve seen more shite on this app than I’ve scraped off Daniel’s shoes.

Here’s who I follow, and why.

#TrustTheFold | #MaureenSays

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

12. @WeirdBritNews

Followed for the haunted pub reviews. Stayed for the possessed Greggs signs.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

11. @TechnicallyRon

Sad. Funny. Wrote something once that made me feel things.
Never forgiven him.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

10. @MumsnetTowers

For research purposes.

I read the threads, judge the chaos, then make a brew.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

9. @NoContextBrits

Like looking in a mirror.
A very judgmental, beige mirror.

10/10. Would grumble along again.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

8. @BBCBreaking

So I can say “I bloody told you so” in real time.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

7. @coldwarsteve

If Britain had a fever dream, this is what it would look like.

I get half his references. The other half haunt me.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

6. @CushtyPete

Idiot. Liar. Probably armed.

But my Daniel trusts him. So I keep an eye on him.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

5. @DMelodrama82819

My son. Bless him.

Overthinks everything. Still can’t boil an egg without a crisis.

I follow him to make sure he’s not crying online again.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

4. @MayaGoodfellow

Because someone needs to say it — and she says it properly.

If the Fold had a reading list, she’d be top of it.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

3. @GrumpySkeletor

Angry, unfiltered, probably needs a lozenge.

So naturally I relate.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

2. @SoVeryBritish

Petty behaviour. Awkward silences. Passive aggression disguised as manners.

It's basically a mirror.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

1. @RealDeniseWelch

Follows me home in spirit every time I lose it over the news.

Loud. Northern. Always right.

Denise, if you see this — let’s form a union.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

@salemsdaughters @CushtyPete I’m not in a cult, love.
I’m the backbone of a movement and the reason three people are still alive.

Call it what you want — just don’t call during Emmerdale.

[MaureenWheelz @MaureenWheelz]

@salemsdaughters How many cups of tea does the average Brit drink?

Not enough to survive a Cull, love.

I’m on cup 210 and it's not even 3pm