nim chimpsky

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

@LolShinya Thanks for the heads up!

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

HOLY CHRIST @nbatopshot @PackripMahoment @PackripEwing @jonboybeats

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

Hoped back in the que… Am I dreaming…?

[Guy in line at the Gas Station @playingthelotto]

@reddskyy_ @jaketropolis

[Brooke Jamieson @brooke_jamieson]

My coworkers are exhausted from generating shareholder value all day

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

@PUNISHEDJINGTAO we broke out

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

hoping @colludingnode sees this

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

bathroom line at tawny >>>

[David Brand @DavidFBrand]

If you're a socialist Knicks fan who loves soccer and lives in a rent-stabilized apartment, June 2026 could end up being the best month of your life

[🐪 Miskeen and 5'14" @MoodyKnowsNada]

Just some bullshit

[xcx source @xcxsource]

Charli xcx with The Dare and a fan tonight in NYC.🖤

[Brooke Jamieson @brooke_jamieson]

hello @wizards_magic this is the best shot you've had at getting more new women to play magic in years - please I am begging you to make some 'magic 101 for figure skating fans' video content and then partner with our queen Amber to do some magic 101 events irl
cc @Jonnymagic00

[一位善良英俊的美国叔叔 @40cardfriedman]

CORRECT OPINION:

Ice cream is the benchmark dessert that all other desserts must hope to beat in order to be worth consuming.

I have, in my long and meandering life, never had dessert that is superior to high-quality ice cream. And believe me, I love eating dessert. Ice cream sits at the definitive global maximum of the landscape of various sweets and treats that decorate our tables and raise our blood glucose levels.

Think about it critically. At no point have you ever had a dessert which would not have been improved by adding a scoop of ice cream.

Cookies -> Ice cream sandwiches

Cake -> Ice cream cake

Pie -> a la mode

Brownie -> topped with a scoop of vanilla

Mochi -> Mochi filled with ice cream

This is not complicated.

Winners win, and ice cream is a winner in the world of dessert.

Yes, this includes all the variants like gelato, coconut-based or soy-based fake ice cream for the lactose-intolerant, or even the reduced sugar or reduced fat variants that try to maintain 60% of the joy of the dessert with only 50% of the caloric punishment.

And the Ninja Creami Greek Yogurt pseudo-ice cream that has incredible macronutrient ratios even sort of works like ice cream for the incredibly health-conscious among us. You don't see people on Twitter crowing about their healthy fake protein doughnuts or perfect macro creme brulee.

Of course, the variety of flavors, add-ons, forms (milkshake, float, sandwich, bar, with/without toppings) add to the novelty that keeps ice cream fresh and joyful. There aren't half as many flavors of, say, cheesecake or pie, as there are of ice cream. And if a new dessert with many different variations were to become popular, an enterprising culinary inventor would simply make an ice cream that subsumed and inherited the flavor of said dessert.

Whenever I am out at a restaurant (which is regularly necessary as part of regular socialization, despite the vast majority of them being scam establishments) and dessert is being discussed as an option, I quickly and intuitively open the discussion towards potentially leaving the restaurant and decamping to a nearby ice cream parlor for a superior apres-dinner experience.

Real eaters recognize the wisdom in the suggestion.

Additionally, young women enjoy going to ice cream parlors as part of the romantic journey, as it evokes a very wholesome, innocent get-together from a simpler era that makes the man seem less overtly physical in his intentions. They aren't going to sit down with you and eat a thick slice of cake (as it will make them feel gluttonous), but a mint chocolate chip cone? Absolutely. Mix ice cream parlors into your dating stack (as an occasional treat, compared to an endless stream of cocktail bars) and see what happens.

And of course, who could forget the "Ice Cream Paradox", which is described at length in this Atlantic article: https://t.co/rircai3DNg

Yes, there is a persistent correlation between ice cream consumption and better health outcomes among diabetics. Not candy, not cupcakes, but real, honest-to-God ice cream.

Now, if you start chomping down daily pints of Ben & Jerry's insisting that it's healthy, you will probably make both Bryan Johnson and your doctor very sad, but if you choose to indulge in a dessert that's more decadent than the ascetic choice of a bowl of fruit, you will simply never beat ice cream.

It's simple: take the ice cream pill, and live in bliss.

[Patrick Sullivan @BasicMountain]

Adam Sandler as an annoying, hubristic Floridian money drafter/occasional RCQ cheater who gets in too deep on high stakes Vintage cube 3v3s and ends up getting shot while trying to rob a Waffle House.

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

@MartinJuza @Huschenmtg @kaibudde @Mengu09 Remember that draft pod?!

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

@MartinJuza @Huschenmtg @kaibudde I played Kai Budde at my second Pro Tour when I was 16. Easily one of the scariest moments of my life. He could tell I was rattled and nervous and at one point just told me to breathe and relax. I’ll never forget that moment. The German Juggernaut is the 🐐

[kelbin @pissboymcgee]

I wish so badly I could be friends with this dude. Anyone that does a 9 minute LCD soundsystem song for karaoke is someone I want to be around

[nim chimpsky @mhaydenb]

@Altered_TCG gimmmme that sukenik special

[Dancing Astronaut @dancingastro]

Above & Beyond, all of Forest Hills singing Sun & Moon, and the push the button moment. Peak.

Thank you @aboveandbeyond for tonight 🐐