Mom, its a joke

i'm bridget, i enjoy cats, awKward capItaLization, sLeeping MorE than humanly PossiLE, the beAch, and SomEtimes poking dead things with sticks! 🐜

[Mom, its a joke @midgeybridgey]

I sing American Pie by Don McLean every day because I'll be
Singin' this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die and sure enough it will be the day I die.

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

What we are witnessing is an outright abuse of power.

This administration is attacking critics and using fear as a weapon to silence anyone who would speak out. Media corporations — from television networks to newspapers — are capitulating to these threats.

We cannot dare to be silent or complacent in the face of this frontal assault on free speech.

We, the People, deserve better.

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

YES. The president should be concerned about political violence. ALL political violence - including the attacks against MN legislators and Paul Pelosi.

NO. The president should not use the tragic murder of Charlie Kirk to undermine democracy and attack his political opponents.

[Mom, its a joke @midgeybridgey]

All of my first dates go so well, I think I really am in love with myself

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Mr. President, don’t take your anger out on me - I’m just a silly girl.

Take it out on whoever convinced you to betray the American people and our Constitution by illegally bombing Iran and dragging us into war.

It only took you 5 months to break almost every promise you made.

[Gilly 🖤 @Gillian275Gm]

Dr Jill is an academic with a doctorate. Not a medical Dr.

Mind you. I'm not a gynaecologist, but I know a c**t when I see one.....

[Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton]

👀 You have got to be kidding me.

https://t.co/IhhvFvw6DG

[Mom, its a joke @midgeybridgey]

I do have a candy dish for social reasons, but I fill it with war heads so my coworkers know what to expect

[Stephen King @StephenKing]

What’s the difference between Trump’s cabinet and a cactus?
With a cactus, all the pricks are on the outside.
Thank you, I’ll be here all week. Don’t forget to tip your waitress.

[Olivia Julianna 🇺🇸🦅🗳️ @0liviajulianna]

jail hopefully

[Grant Certiorari @GrantCertiorari]

They want to defund Planned Parenthood.

They want to defund NPR.

They want to defund the Education Department.

They want to defund the National Weather Service.

The MAGA party doesn’t know how to build. Only destroy.

[Evan @daviddunn177]

Uneducated voters are a much greater threat than illegal immigrants.

[Alex Cole @acnewsitics]

Trump's cabinet is bringing in more rapists than the illegal immigrants he talks about.

[alexa @vampirrria]

we should become worse

[Boston Smalls @smalls2672]

Maga: we voted Trump because libtards keep calling us stupid.

Also maga: wait, obamacare IS the affordable care act?

[Jen (ESC) 🇨🇦❤️🦋 @Smil3yAngel]

I have never once, in my 45 years of living, been harassed in a bathroom by a trans female.

However, I have been harassed by a man walking down the street minding my own business many, many, many, many times.

Gender neutral bathrooms aren't the problem.

[Joe Walsh @WalshFreedom]

It’s not a surprise that a number of these cabinet picks would fail an FBI background check. The guy we just elected President would fail an FBI background check.

[Jo @JoJoFromJerz]

Republicans: We don’t know enough about Kamala & we just don’t trust her.

Also Republicans: We know Trump and Gaetz are rapists & we just don’t care.

[Jon Cooper 🇺🇸 @joncoopertweets]

Sorry, but I have a feeling this is gonna be me for the next four years.