mommyneedsadrink

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

At what age is it acceptable to start giving my kids the finger?

[Mommy Needs a Life @momneedsalife3]

Nothing ruins my day faster than my kid asking what’s for dinner at breakfast.

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

@DrtyHandsHustle @kaichoyce Chris D’Elia

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

@adamgreattweet Barney Stinson from How I met your mother

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

@hitRECordJoe

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

At what age is it acceptable to start giving my kids the finger?

[Alyssa Limperis @alyssalimp]

me 3 seconds into the mr. rogers trailer https://t.co/L4MEkKOFjS

[Sarcastic Mommy @sarcasticmommy4]

My kids said they wanted to try something new this summer so I showed them how to vacuum & do laundry.

[Sarcastic Mommy @sarcasticmommy4]

Driving home with my kids & my son didn’t like the song I was listening to. He said, “Thank God we’re 10 seconds from home!” & then I took the long way home because that’s what parents do.

[Sarcastic Mommy @sarcasticmommy4]

We've reached that part of the day where my kids ask what's for dinner & then tell me they don't want that for dinner.

[One Ordinary Girl @audri_em]

Peanut butter m&ms for breakfast because you have to make this life livable.

[Mommy Owl @Mommy__Owl]

I hate when I’m so late answering a text that I have to pretend I never saw it.

[mommyneedsadrink @momneedsdrinks]

People in SE Michigan be like #meteor

[NUFF @nuffsaidny]

People in Detroit, Michigan enjoying their Tuesday night but also keeping an eye out for falling meteors. #meteor

[Joe Biden @JoeBiden]

It’s not how a president should speak. It’s not how a president should behave. Most of all, it’s not what a president should believe. We’re better than this.

[🇺🇸 Happy ChillMore™ 🇨🇦 @cravin4]

All I'm saying is I don't always cry during Toy Story 3.... Sometimes I turn it off before Andy goes to college.

[Antonella212 (Instagram) @NYorNothing]

Cool ur 6yr old has an $800 iPhone? At 6, I prayed my mom would hit the lotto so I could get the box of 64 crayons with a built-in sharpener

[Antonella212 (Instagram) @NYorNothing]

This guy at Whole Foods Tribeca is picking a yogurt more carefully than i pick dicks to go in my mouth

[JC Tarp @jctwritesstuff]

Hard worker. Pretty sweet moves. A little rougher than expected which was a bonus. Excellent hair-puller. 4/5

~ My Yelp review of your dad