Nicole Keefe

Do your squats, take your vitamins, smile at strangers, and you'll never have a bad day in your life.

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

If you’re a man at the gym and approach me saying, “teehee, sorry I keep walking behind you” - I’m reporting you. @CrunchGym

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Halloween night and I’m seasoning my molcajete. We are not the same

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Everyone should take an airplane etiquette class before they board

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

I woke myself up this morning by saying, “7/10 wouldn’t sleep on the couch again”. I’m glad I live by myself.

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

I’m absolutely LIVING for the Valvoline on Rt 13 where the mechanic messed up and had to call his boss, a Woman, to help him fix his mistake.

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

I’m almost 30 and I’m learning that I’m still not grown up yet. Life is very confusing.

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

When my really jacked coworker was mansplaining to me how to do a deadlift, my brain just replayed this:

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Advice from a superior: “Being a female in the military, you either have to be a bitch or a pushover- but pushovers don’t get the job done”

[baseballin' @inthephanattic]

if you have watched the 2021 philadelphia phillies you are entitled to financial compensation

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

@ItsKWhite @chancetherapper Goosebumps

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Tell me you’re in the military w/o telling me you’re in the military: “hey, how are ya” “oh, just living the dream” “yours or somebody else’s dream?” “depends on the day”

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

The trick to be unapproachable at a gym full of meathead guys is to roll your eyes when you see them checking you out 👌🏼

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Pickles are the best hangover food idc what anyone else thinks

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

I miss rugby bruises

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

Some friendly advice given to me when I was struggling to carry a lot of boxes: “You may be an optimist, but you’re not an octopus” 🐙

[Stephen King @StephenKing]

The fly knows.

[Nicole Keefe @nicoleckeefe]

I saw a man selling (what it looked like) butterflies in a container on the side of the road, but then when I drove past again I SWEAR this man was was selling cockroaches #philly

[Andrew Mild @MILDshake]

Bad Things Happen In Philadelphia.