So sad I relapsed and got some good cuts on my arms pretty sure one or two of them were mini beans but I didnt take pictures and now im too lazy to uncover and recover them again😭😭
Bpd numbness is so bizarre bc wdym i will feel absolutely nothing even when relapsing, having sex, and laughing? Wdym i will be in real danger and my nervous system doesnt kick in to warn me? Wdym i will physically not feel just as much as i emotionally dont?
being undiagnosed while knowing there is something wrong with you but you cant say 'oh yeah im autistic' 'yeah i have depression' because then youre a self-diagnosing attention seeker who uses buzzwords is a different kind of pain
i hate being passively suicidal because my suicidal thoughts have gotten so much fucking worse but i still don’t have any intention of killing myself at the moment so it feels too selfish to just tell someone i keep thinking about killing myself
On hour 30 of not eating<3. I miss smoking but its the only thing that gives me hunger so being sober just leaves me with little to no desire of food. God i hope i die soon.