Peter Halpin

#comedy creator, #scriptwriter & #actor
...
I live in a teeny countryside village but still have good internet. Winning.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@BBCRadio4 The Shopping Forecast

#Christmas #shopping #comedysketch #audiocomedy #radio4 #theshippingforecast

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@mrmarkdolan Sorry Mark but it's not. Anyone calling for a re-run of the GE now but voted Tory at any point in the last 5 years needs their brains thoroughly checked.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

I wonder how many people who signed the #petition for a re-run of the #GeneralElection continued voting Tory over the past decade, despite all their horrendous errors, lies (inc to the Queen), deceit & hypocrisy. 🤔🤔

#starmer #conservatives #labour #uk

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

#trump

https://t.co/5yTeEDDXUk

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

#Trump has been accused of having poor taste in his choice of decor and soft furnishings...

But have you seen his #cabinet??

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

One day I want to be as good at hiding as tiny shards of broken glass from two weeks ago.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

#America, why have you voted for proven unpredictability, danger, aggression and discrimination to the point of criminality to lead your country? Your other option was one of intelligence, fairness, progress and improvement. But you rejected all that. Again, why?

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

Pay more with @nectar at @sainsburys 😂💰

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@brendanactingup I'm assuming you'd like at least 1 of the 2 parts to be for a male not unlike Brendan Purcell. Does the other role have any requirements?

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@sarahlmorgan Hello. I'm studying a Masters in Comedy Writing and would love to interview you very quickly for an essay. 1 hour max, just on Zoom/Teams. Is that possible in the next 2-3 weeks? 😬🤞🏻🙏🏼
I hope you don't hate emojis.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

Playing kids' #Scrabble with my son and thought he was crudely telling me he couldn't make a word. Turns out he was reading me his letters: "Daddy, I've got fuccoal".

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

This turn-yourselves-into-Pixar-characters thing removed our son from existence.

How does technology know what we're really thinking...?!

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@iDanielPeak Hello. I'm studying a Masters in Comedy Writing and would love to interview you very quickly for an essay. 1 hour max, just on Zoom/Teams. Is that possible in the next 2-3 weeks? 😬🤞🏻🙏🏼
I hope you don't hate emojis.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@Neutrogena Please employ at least 1 person who understands grammar. This should read "96% noticed fewer new spots", not less.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@Nigel_Farage Whereas you just want to take basic human rights, peace and safety away from anyone with higher levels of melatonin than you. You're a disgrace to humanity, Farage.

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

Good start by Farage. Late, intimidating, and childish. 🙄
Starting as he means to go on...?
#ReformUK #FeebleFarage

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@easyjet Look at the time on the screenshot and the time I'm posting this. We're all still in the terminal, with no announcements to update us. You honestly think we'll be taking-off in 4mins??

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@__A1fie__ Classic. A man judges a woman by her clothes instead of her character or anything else respectful that actually matters. 🙄🤦🏻‍♂️

(No, I didn't vote Labour, before anyone jumps to that)

[Peter Halpin @peterhalpin]

@Mofoman360 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

No.