Melissa

go bills go bucks go noles

[tay 🖤 @tayylorrmaee]

i just know he was mumbling "ehhh I don't know Jim" while staring at his car keys like the green goblin mask

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

It's actually insane to refer to your girlfriend (are you calling her that? Unclear.) as twin even if you're trying to be ~*funny*~ @Conrad_Wilson

[Bye Wig Hello Drama @HousewivesHub]

West wishes Amanda a Happy Birthday

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

It's 9:45 and there is a woman in the pool aggressively keeping score and yelling about a pool volleyball match. Again, go to bed

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

Me to all the kids at the hotel pool using the hot tub

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

I am home for maybeeee 15 hours tomorrow before my next work thing. Frank is at my parents because I'm basically gone for 2 weeks. An I insane if I go out of my way to visit in this window

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

@ComplexSports @sophie_cham Jw what @Conrad_Wilson 's thots are on this 🤸‍♀️

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

I would likely worry regardless but I saw two (2) roaches today and didn't realize was even an issue outside of the south east?? The cats would never allow this.

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

Wait I went to Disneyland and never saw a single cat and I'm now very sad because I miss mine. And I thought the Disneyland cats were a thing?? Are the cats ok

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

Asked for a chef so I could make an allergy order and a man wanting to order bare noodles for his child (no allergy) skips me of course. Theme parks really do bring out the audacity.

[briana 👽🩷 @neo_noires]

She was a ring girl at an event owned by Dana White, who slapped his wife. She was there for a Conor McGregor match and her raped a woman. She had to get her tampon surgically removed, but sure Sophie... "Protect women."

[Grace @gracecamille_]

girl I’m bored let’s take our fluoxetine

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

When the bartender pours you both chardonnays to taste like you can tell the difference 😂
Frankly just tell me what's the cheaper one

[COCO @TWOTIMESABITCH]

“men are providers,” yeah, of mental illness.

[AWelshGuy @prowelshguy]

how I felt leaving the theater after The Odyssey

[𝔐𝔢𝔤𝔞𝔫 🐈‍⬛ @saint_witch_]

Odysseus describing his 20 years away to Penelope

[Aaron 🦦 @nonameoptions]

Odysseus and his crew after pissing off Zeus

[🍋 @lemoncarcass]

a nia sanchez fox news correspondent pipeline tracks

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

Kinda already wanted to go see the Odyssey in theaters but damn the ladies' press outfits are convincing me more

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

🤔

[Ashley Reese @offbeatorbit]

I’ll allow it.

[Melissa @pissylikemissy]

@offbeatorbit From Buffalo, went to college in Ohio, and I always say this. Like the accent is similar for all of the Great Lakes. And we say pop!