Rob........

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@AcornBrewery "Statuesque" by Sleeper a cracking song IMO, plus the meaning of it as graceful and dignified

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@godblesstoto Reckon it's an antique tool possibly made by Kier Starmers dad

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@SkySportsPL No attempt to play the ball, shouldn't that be a red card

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@dougokane88 Blatant dive not sure which game the ref is watching

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats That is an impressive stat 👏

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats Chopra ?

[A View From Yorkshire @models_by_Russ]

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary,

I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator.

I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme.

Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate.

I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave.

You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise.

Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount.

For £35,000 I will:
   •   Leave quietly.
   •   Not require a press conference.
   •   Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.
   •   Even carry my own suitcase to the airport.

I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme.

Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus.

Who knew?

While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes.

May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue.

In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on.

If successful, I promise to:
   •   Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).
   •   Not stage a protest on the runway.
   •   And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice.

All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV.

Yours in hopeful relocation,
A slightly confused taxpayer

[Barnsley FC On This Day in History @BarnsleyFCOTD]

On this day in 1911, Barnsley played a friendly game against a team of players drawn from other Yorkshire clubs to raise money for the families of the 344 men and boys killed in the Pretoria Mining Disaster. On the morning of 21 December 1910, an underground explosion ripped through the pit near Westhoughton in Lancashire and the death toll made it the second deadliest mine disaster ever in England. With the exception of Tommy Boyle, Barnsley’s team was the one that played in the FA Cup Final of 1910. The game ended in a 4-4 draw. #BarnsleyFC #PretoriaMineDisaster

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats I now know this is wrong , missed him in the comments

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats Iain Hume?

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats I'll try Gary Jones

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFC What, how is Tennai Watson not on this list 🤣

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFC @oxensportsuk Great shirt and I love the Toby tyke badge,
Limited edition, too, makes it even more desirable. The fact that it's mostly sold out online almost proves it, still I'm happy with Kes version.

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFCStats @The_Mannster @SmallwoodDeclan @BaileyyBland @Joogeyboy @bryn14181 @joshsut06336605 @AndyH_Tyke @teestyke1969 @louthetyke1980 If I could spell it would have been higher

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@AndyRobsonTips Barnsley

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFC His best game for a while

[Rob........ @Robb287]

Refs a joke buying everything the spanish are sellimg#Lionesses

[Rob........ @Robb287]

Barnsley fc a rare delight indeed

[Rob........ @Robb287]

@BarnsleyFC @oxensportsuk A rare delight