dr. evelyn lasagna

unprofessional dingdong | policy wonk

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

“that’s why i get paid the big bucks” i say, unfolding a two dollar bill the size of a mattress

[Alex @alexxmalloy]

hunter biden summer, smoking cigarettes and telling everyone to go fuck themselves

[cheyenne @cheyeyeyeyey]

Please stop announcing the Northern Lights will be visible if they will not be visible to me.

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@NotAsian_Tyler @throatenator currently waiting for mine to call me and wondering if i should just be dead instead

[Seth @fiercepatricks]

Friendly reminder that Pride isn't about turning your straight kids into gay kids. It's about not turning gay kids into dead kids.

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@magalyhey @hthieblot it told me I got to the end of the Internet once

[MP Arizona☀️🏳️‍🌈💙🌵🐕🐕‍🦺🫂💦🏜🐟🌴🎙🌎🌻♍️🌊 @AzPetrich]

A. MAN. WHO. MAKES. A. DEAL. THAT. INCLUDES. A. PERMANENT. IRS. IMMUNITY. CLAUSE. FOR. HIMSELF. HIS. FAMILY. AND. HIS. COMPANY'S. IS. A. FUCKING. TAX. DODGING. CRIMINAL.

[trash jones @jzux]

me when my friends are having a bad day: that’s your anxiety talking. i promise it won’t always feel like this and I love you no matter what

me when i have a bad day: this time i have finally realized the Truth. that i am bad and my life will never get better

[prezoh @prezoh]

@TheMovieMermaid Sorry. i'm just really stupid: and i'm a piece of
shit.

[໊ @sonohoor]

i am a friend to all cats. yes even the mean ones. they have their reasons

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@Boilers32 It most definitely was not. I would never have forgotten my drugs.

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@los_jiv art (maybe)

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

it’s actually pretty irresponsible to put eyelash glue in your eyebrows

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@los_jiv I glued candles to my face jeff

[Purrs 🏴 @NewPerspectives]

BTW ICE is raping children in custody in texas then deporting the newborns after they're born. These children are not pregnant before entering ICE detention.

[Assal Rad @AssalRad]

You don’t kill 133 healthcare workers by accident.

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@RiaOtero @thatgalgrass seriously! i was such a horse kid and they had horses so i was always locked in about what he was doing, i would def remember

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@RiaOtero @thatgalgrass once she was randomly like “it was so nice of aunt jeanne to send a letter about uncle vern passing.” i said “what?? he died?” she swears she told me but i KNOW i’d remember

[dr. evelyn lasagna @roboticlettuce]

@NotAsian_Tyler my cousins and aunt/uncle live in the ALT suburbs and someone gave my uncle tickets. my dad loves golf so he was super excited. i hope you get to go eventually!