em (she/they)

banana bread dude? HELL yea

[em (she/they) @shrimpymiku]

they should add guns to animal crossing

[𝓜𝓪𝓽𝓽 ✈️ @mldiffley]

That 2 week stretch in June when there were 4 World Cup games every day

[sam 🍂 @burritoprophet]

i’m glad his family and friends love him and aren’t like those cunt monkeys that bullied my baby Punch

[Anónimas @Anonimasenamora]

Ser la novia es temporal, pero ser la ex h0t, hermosa, divina, perfecta, educada, espléndida, crack, iconica, graciosa, ídola, bellísima e irreemplazable, es para siempre.

[em (she/they) @shrimpymiku]

if i’m sisyphus my boulder is dating emotionally unavailable men

[Louise Jensen Duffy (also Ernest Jensen) @LouiseWeebe]

You’re listening to Sisyphus FM, the home of non-stop rock.

[em (she/they) @shrimpymiku]

@Marriott2bonvoy アメリカと日本人のハーフです😊

[Beautiful Normal Woman @SillyBWoman]

Can I come over and Writhe Around in Agony

[em (she/they) @shrimpymiku]

my best friend of 15+ years is the only one who knows how to humble me

[em (she/they) @shrimpymiku]

Still geeking over this, went to a world cup game to see Japan play and it was easily the best day of my life, if i ever get married or have a child it won’t even come close

[James Tate @JamesTate121]

I think women should decide what to do with Mitch McConnell's body since he decided what to do with theirs.

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

I’d unplug Mitch to charge my phone.

[Nathan @NathanIsRed]

Watching the World Cup and still seeing Pulisic commercials

[Leo Daube @leodaube]

Me at the British Museum

[Ross Sayers @Sayers33]

Infantino: ok I will do some corruption as long as you promise not to tell anyone

Trump: *surrounded by journalists* he's an infant folks, little Bambino Infantino. I told him to jump, he said how high. He can't jump actually, he's very bad at it. I leap. No one can leap like me

[Plus EV Analytics @PlusEVAnalytics]

FIFA: "no of course this was not political interference, we would never allow such a thing"
Trump: "it was all me. I interfered. Politically."

Spectacular.

[Jon @jonbir90]

Nothing against people who only get into football during the World Cup but it honestly doesn't come close to when you want to set yourself on fire on a Wednesday night after work in October because you're watching your team drawing 0-0 against Swansea in the Carabao Cup.

[k🎱 @crtfydyapper]

loverboys will forever be the best genre of men

[T.M. Opera Cro @ChiEmeOperaBirt]

ok but all of this DID happen with argentina vs cape verde

[madiiiii ⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖ @madsdanae]

I would say happy birthday, America, but unfortunately I love abortions and immigrants and public education and universal healthcare and Black people and the environment and not bombing children with my tax dollars.