Shyan Teal

Reader, work in progress romance writer, blind,mildly obsessed with my dog. she/her. Instagram @shyanely

[Sridhar Ramesh @RadishHarmers]

Joe Biden and Donald Trump are only three and a half years apart in age. It's not that one of them is significantly older than the other. What I am saying is, there would be no problematic age gap were they to fall in love.

[Heather Hogan @theheatherhogan]

My neighborhood Reddit sometimes has posts from people who have social anxiety and want to try some new place so they ask for step-by-step instructions for how to interact with the space, and commenters show up in droves to help them create a plan to go get a tea or croissant.

[Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred]

Having allergies is so embarrassing. Could I have some medicine? I’m being bullied by the air.

[Shyan Teal @shyteal_]

We don’t have the lottery in my state and I’m convinced that is the only reason I haven’t won the lottery

[MonsterKing @CerromeRussell]

What is it about a Farmer's market that make you ball out and spend money like a dope boy?

[Mediocre Mom @MediocreMamaa]

Listen, I’m done having kids. But when I’m rocking my 1yo to sleep and she’s super sleepy and I look at her and smile and her whole face lights up and she gives me a super sleepy smile back? It’s honestly a miracle that I don’t have 39 children just for that alone.

[Ash Dylan @AshDylanLit]

“in the shower??” is for romance novels, not classified documents

[Shyan Teal @shyteal_]

Packed myself2 pairs of shoes for a trip and my child who can’t walk 4 pairs

[Sophia Benoit @1followernodad]

Halfway through the book and uhhh do the Rich Dad and Poor Dad even kiss?

[Cat Elgarrista @cat_elg]

those 5 minutes when a man is shaving and all that’s left is the mustache and he’s walking around saying “maybe i’ll keep it” are the most terrifying 5 minutes of a woman’s life

[Fresh Lettuce @newLettuce]

[library]
hi do you have any books about when a guy is really mad at one specific whale

[Noah Garfinkel @NoahGarfinkel]

The “guns don’t kill people” people sure seem to think a book can make you gay.

[Kelly Turnbull @Coelasquid]

I don’t completely understand how athletic tape works so I sort of assume the physiotherapist transcribes some runes on you and it fixes your tennis elbow

[Shyan Teal @shyteal_]

Buying baby furniture online is funny. Every description is like new, but has been chewed on a bit and just has a few teeth marks.

[Shyan Teal @shyteal_]

@shadesnpages I Want You Back by Lorelei James the MC has an STD that he tells her about before they have sex but I don’t remember how the conversation comes about

[Boze Herrington, Library Owl 😴🧙‍♀️ @SketchesbyBoze]

funniest moment in It’s a Wonderful Life is when George says “what happened to Mary in the dark timeline where I don’t exist” and Clarence says “George, you really don’t��” and George says “TELL ME” and Clarence says “she’s SINGLE and RUNNING A LIBRARY”

[Shyan Teal @shyteal_]

Just finished an entire tube of lip balm without losing it. I’ve never felt more accomplished.

[Burning Mom ⚡️ @MomOnFire]

“Actually, peanuts aren’t nuts, they’re beans,” I said, absolutely killing it in every social setting.

[Ariel Elias @Ariel_Comedy]

Mostly jealous that the UK can take 6 weeks to realize that they've made a mistake but women in the US can't.