sydney 🪄

i'm the notification u've been waiting for

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

#Squaredle 05/03
53/53 words (+18 bonus words)
⏱️ In the top 27% by speed
🔥 Solve streak: 1
https://t.co/qhzctjtljq

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

@dalepartridge Unless you have the necessary anatomy to potentially necessitate an abortion, you shouldn’t really have much of a say in the matter. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Kristi @oh_em_fn_gee]

Please do not invite me to things outside. It's hot and I'm fat

[Kristi @oh_em_fn_gee]

A mosquito just flew by my ear and said, "we back bitch"

[Sassparilla @Megatronic13]

What kind of monster carries a baby for 9 months and endures hours of agonizing labor only to hold that beautiful baby in their arms and name her Karen?

[Cats Against Humanity™ @CatsVsHumanity]

Me: Age is just a number

My body: And today you're 85 lol

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

How’s life going for you lately?...oh you know....

[Sassparilla @Megatronic13]

To the 3% of you who regularly keep up on your laundry, what’s it like to be a sociopath?

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

When that tax return hits your bank account... #itonlylastslike4seconds #richfor14seconds

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

@MiseryHighlight

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

Why does “friends with benefits” never include health, vision, or dental?

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

Day 4 of stupid random hives: I’ve determined I am allergic to this absolute bullshit. But what can I say I’ve never slept better. #benadrylismybff #allergictosomething #overit #thosefuckedupdreamsthough

[shen the bird @Shen_the_Bird]

me: i've finally conquered my fear of ghosts

therapist: that's the spirit

me: oh fuck where

[Cats Against Humanity™ @CatsVsHumanity]

Of course I made it weird, it's what I do.

[Oaks @OakHill_]

This is a bargain. I’ve always paid at least $5.

[sydney 🪄 @sidneyowl71]

Where is all this snow I was promised? I need it justify my decisions to stay home all day and do absolutely nothing. #lazybitch #wheresthatsnow #thanksalotweatherguy

[sarah jeong @sarahjeong]

i like how we spent centuries at the mercy of measles and once we defeated it a handful of ding dongs took the side of measles

[Lauren Hogg @lauren_hoggs]

Alyssa
Beigel
Martin
Nick
Feis
Jaime
Hixon
Luke
Cara
Gina
Joaquin
Alaina
Meadow
Helena
Alex
Carmen
Peter

#parkland