Soapbox Systems 🍑

[William "Balloon Guy" Kim @TheKimulation]

There are two types of countries: those that can deploy a Tactical Burger King anywhere in the world and those that use the metric system

[For Those About to Rock @richdruler]

This dude is in my local parade today because he lost his fantasy football league 🙂

[Annie Agar @AnnieAgar]

ITS A BAD DAY TO BE A COLD BEER, A HOT DOG, OR ENGLAND.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMERICA 🦅🇺🇸

[Dudes Posting Their W’s @DudespostingWs]

On July 4th, 2022, a protester tried to interrupt the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. Joey Chestnut, mid-hot dog inhale, immediately put him in a headlock and then went right back to eating. He still won the contest that year. Legend.

[jess ⚡️ @JessNoFace]

as a soccer fan of 3 weeks it is unforgivable what these refs are doing to our beautiful game

[Matt Smethurst @MattSmethurst]

40% of fatherhood is walking around the house, turning off lights.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I wish life could just stay like this forever.

[Super 70s Sports @Super70sSports]

When I was 12 years old I’d wake up on a Saturday morning, watch some cartoons and pro wrestling, go outside and throw a rubber ball off the side of the house, get the guys in the neighborhood together for Wiffle Ball, go inside for Atari and snacks, ride my bike to Dairy Queen for a Mr. Misty, listen to Casey Kasem, flip on ESPN and watch sports with no social commentary, flip it over to MTV, which showed actual music videos, go back outside for more Wiffle Ball, and then think “Hey, it’s almost 3 pm.” Living my best life and had no fucking idea how good I had it.

[Tim Kaine @timkaine]

Mr. President—I’ve never said thank you before . . .

But now I will . . .

Thanks for staying away from Games 1, 2, 4 and 5!

You should get an NBA Peace Prize!

[Canada Hates Trump @AntiTrumpCanada]

If thousands of people gather to cheer your name being ripped off a building at 4:00 am, even though you ordered the work hidden behind a tarp, just imagine how long the lineup will be to piss on your grave. Try to put a tarp around that motherfucker!

[Soapbox Systems 🍑 @soapboxsystems]

What a fucking baby.

[BrooklynDad_Defiant!☮️ @mmpadellan]

I don't know about you guys, but watching Hunter Biden slay trolls with sharp wit and self-deprecating humor this week has made this site bearable.

Thank you, @HunterBiden.
Congrats on your sobriety milestone.

Give 'em hell, brother.🙏💪

[one dozen rats at a keyboard @PanasonicDX4500]

I know it’s become pretty cliche and cringey to talk about at this point but if you’re under like 25 I cannot stress enough how one time Obama wore a tan suit and people spent a week arguing over whether or not it was demeaning to the Oval Office and they were serious about it.

[Governor Newsom Press Office (parody) @AwesomeNewsom]

American soldiers die in Trump's war, not a word from Donald. Gas and food prices skyrocket, not a word from Donald. People demand the Epstein files, not a word from Donald. But the minute you take his fat name off a building, Donald writes Mein Kampf for Morons.

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

Massive bombshell. Anthropic co-founder Chris Olah warns that AI will displace human labor on a catastrophic global scale. He confirms tech elites have absolutely no mechanism to share the wealth, leaving the global poor completely abandoned to suffer. He is 100% accurate.

[Todd Spence @Todd_Spence]

That time a THE PRICE IS RIGHT contestant (Alene Glover) blacked out after winning the Showcase, so the show just ran the credits while they tried to revive her lol (1976)

[NOLLY @omoelerinjare1]

Los Angeles, 15-year-old Clara Daly from California, was travelling with her mom.

A flight attendant asked if anyone knew sign language. Clara, who had studied ASL for about a year, volunteered.

The passenger was 64-year-old Tim Cook, who is deaf and blind, flying alone. Clara knelt in the aisle and fingerspelled into his hand to communicate. She helped him order water, check the time, and speak with the crew.

For the rest of the long flight, she stayed with him, chatting until landing and bringing comfort to his journey.

[Harry Sisson @harryjsisson]

Trump had one of his worst mental health episodes yet last night, posting over 55 times in 3 hours. Here is the list:

10:15 PM - Accuses Obama of attempting a coup in 2016
10:15 PM - Says Obama worked with CIA to overthrow Trump
10:15 PM - Reposts tweet saying Obama is a “traitor” and that he should be arrested
10:22 PM - Attacks dominion voting systems for 2020 election saying they switched votes
10:22 PM - Says Fulton County, GA had their 2020 fraud exposed (there was none)
10:23 PM - Accuses Obama of personally making $120 million from Obamacare (wtf?)
10:23 PM - Cites quack lawyer Sidney Powell on the 2020 election
10:24 PM - Posts fake JFK Jr account that says Obama wiretapped Trump Tower
10:27 PM - Demands Senator Mark Kelly resign
10:29 PM - Claims neither Biden nor Harris were in charge of the Biden admin
10:29 PM - Attacks Fulton County, GA again
10:29 PM - Posts Fox News clip of Rep Ro Khanna
10:30 PM - Demands Jack Smith be arrested
10:30 PM - Accuses Obama, Clinton, and Comey of treason
10:39 PM - Reposts a tweet from a MAGA account saying they have secret intel proving Clinton and Obama committed crimes
10:39 PM - Reposts a MAGA tweet saying Hillary Clinton should be sent to Haiti
10:40 PM - Says the DOJ is “working hard” to arrest his enemies for treason
10:40 PM - Reposts a tweet attacking his own DOJ and Todd Blanche for no arrests of political enemies
10:40 PM - Posts a TikTok video of people stealing from a convenience store
10:41 PM - Posts a TikTok of someone taking a Door Dash order
10:41 PM - accuses Obama, John Brennan, and Clinton of sedition and treason again
10:42 PM - Posts a video of a man on CCTV footage knocking over food a waiter was carrying
10:47 PM - Calls Obama the “most DEMONIC FORCE” in American politics
10:47 PM - Posts a tweet from Mike Flynn saying 2020 election wasn’t fair
10:49 PM - Attacks Dominion again claiming they stole the 2020 election (it wasn’t)
10:51 PM - Reposts a fake Charlie Kirk account that claimed Obama blocked Hillary Clinton from being prosecuted
10:53 PM - Claims Obama was part of Hillary Clinton’s emails in some way
11:28 PM - Claims a senior Democrat just testified under oath that Senator Adam Schiff leaked classified information
1:13 AM - Attacks the New York Times for reporting on the reflecting pool

This man is clearly not well.