tomb raider of the lost ark

🖋🖤 your unfriendly neighborhood faerista || 30s || please no minors i’m too old for this

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Uuuhhh yeah, can I get a venti cup of fucks to give?

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

“Why is my Spotify suggesting me so much pop and club music in French?” I ask my predominantly Canadian friend group, who all chorus ‘sorry’ in their silly little accents. Little do they know the fault lies with the HR soundtrack that has been on repeat for the last six months.

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

In defiance of the ao3 curse I will simply be updating MORE frequently from the hospital 😤

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@wermbraiin and tbh good for him!!! i just know all parties involved in his playboy era had an amazing time with it like 😚🤌

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@wermbraiin there’s 82 games in a regulation season and i’m just saying even if he goes out to party after only half of them 🙂‍↕️

[retrocvnt @retrocvnty]

Happy Easter!

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

It’s not even the weekend. It’s Friday morning. And also we’re crumbling deep into 1939 at a governmental level. But you never know. Maybe.

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Chugging a Red Bull in the work parking lot at 4:22am singing along to old 2000s pop punk and you know what?? Maybe it’s NOT my weekend. But maybe???? Maybe it’s gonna be my year 🙂‍↕️

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Today someone was starting an argument with me but her eyes pointed in two different directions???? Like ma’am I’m not gonna take this attitude from someone who can see across two separate time zones at once. Your face can’t even agree how the fuck are we supposed to. PLEASE

[Ari🪷 @arikoyarii]

“fuck it we ball” (malnourished, heavy eye bags, dehydrated and on the verge of insanity)

[whalefact @awhalefact]

the whales will not be watching the new hbo harry potter show. you might think this is because very few whales watch any television at all, but it is actually because jk rowling is a terf ass bitch

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@orxmcc literally just finished this one like 30 min ago

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Shoutout to the white people lined up around the block in 93 degree heat for the chance to buy a Trader Joe’s tote bag. May the odds be ever in your favor I guess 🫡

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@valcyries in every aspect except physical i will be there with you

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Happy anniversary to my two favorite (fictional) people

[Evgeni Malkin Padel Facts @sargeantonelli]

“this could be the last dance for them” what if i died? what if i died right now? what if it happened in front of them?

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@sabine_sig66 I literally said earlier when this happened “ooh you caught me in a very court jester time in my life” so !!! I’m the laugh guy!!

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Cop pulled me over on the freeway because he thought I had my cell phone in my hand. Which, given that it was actually an entire smoked turkey leg, might have been less awkward an interaction.

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

@Ravenismeee julie and the motherfuckin phantoms!!!!

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Like have we spoken recently?? no
If you text me coordinates will I be there in record timing to help you hide a body??? yeah no question

[tomb raider of the lost ark @soliversea]

Trying to explain to someone who engages with media in a normal way and actively attends therapy for their trauma and wasn’t there in 2016 about the literal ride or die trauma bond the og fox fandom has with each other