stekanga

[stekanga @sterilecheryl]

*speed dating*
her: hi-

me: i will call you goblin

her: why would you call me that

me: fucking goblin

her: what is wrong with you

me, visibly threatened and punching at nothing: enough words

[stekanga @sterilecheryl]

motif

[wint @dril]

oh no i accidentlally changed my name and lost my blue checkmark again. now people will think im a Virgin

[jo @thejoeydavis]

hi can i get an iced latte with breast milk i mean breast milk i mean breast milk sorry i mean breast milk i mean breast milk i mean

[BuzzFeed @BuzzFeed]

"I never forgot you...ever." https://t.co/NY4lpK6Ps7

[wint @dril]

we are starting to live in a world where a man cant sell 200 containers of WBP ( White Boy Piss) withtout having to sign some kind of paper

[wint @dril]

rate my dogs dick dot com

[wint @dril]

ill wipe the floor with your ass and wipe my ass with your ass and wipe my nuts with my ass and get floor poisoning

[megan @chismosavirus]

nothing pisses me off like this dumbass hat omg

[stekanga @sterilecheryl]

my life

[wint @dril]

i wish i had the motorcycle from tron so i ccoud drive home to my house and fuck the plastic bag i stole from good will

[alessandra @bIiccy]

😐

[wint @dril]

boomer: ih ope they add a new Gun to fortnite
me: i hope my penis mutates into a wolfs penis with extendable ridges so i can jack off easier

[taking my plushies to the end of the world party @2femcel2furious]

saw a grown woman refer to her asshole as a poop coochie and my brain psionically located the nearest gun store and projected its path like the clairvoyance spell in skyrim

[prance @bocxtop]

cannot take “runner’s high” people seriously. have u ever actually been high? what the fuck are u talking about

[MrMattyPlays @G27Status]

Just remembered this is the best moment in the Fallout series