when you mock anything you invite it into your life, its why larping is so effective, but its always going to be an amalgamation of the original, monsters are created
everything in the world has to distract you as you captain your way to the top, its the burden of trying everyday that eventually wears your bones into a crown most could never wear
You can realise anytime that you aren't your mind, but the One able to guide it, still you won't be able to truly embody it until it is felt with all your being.
You get there via intense experience.
If you truly seek to attain mastery of self, pray for God to give you these experiences needed to become such a master β and tolerate whatever that is given to you.
Ask for it. Put it all in God's hands. Trust.
And if you do so, one day you will wake up totally disarmed of the mask you once trained to approach the world with, carrying only your naked authenticity, and you will have to learn to navigate this world anew.
But this time as a conscious creator.