Morgan Allison

I wouldn't be s#!t without my wit. He/Him

[dyl @dillyjung]

I wish there was a restaurant that would let me get other folks leftovers. Leave a couple wings in the basket? I'll take em. Half a steak on the plate? Hand it over pal

[Stein @steinekin]

nobody ever warns you that once you're over 30 you have to keep a bottle of Tums within 10 feet at all times

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@twofriendsmusic First, thanks for another hit with BB21! Perfect mixes for working out! Second, when's the track at 52:41 dropping?! It's a banger!

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@dieseljung I’ve ate and drank well every time I’ve been so no complaints here!

[AUFAMILY @AUFAMILY]

Someone cut Gary’s mic

[Alex Dobrenko @Dobrenkz]

Guys. For real. Look how she’s looking at me! I mean. Find you somebody that looks at you like that!! You know!? We met in church.

[Anker Charging @Anker_Charging]

We've teamed up with @zacksjerryrig, to #giveaway 3 x Power House II 800! ⚡

#PowerHouseII800 is a solar-powered, 500W, portable generator capable of charging almost all of your everyday essentials. 🔋

Enter here👉 https://t.co/I832W8PkTe

[Nomi Kane @NomiRamone]

When I drew this over a year ago I honestly couldn’t fathom how frequently I’d need to repost it.

[Vincent Martella @vince_martella]

covid means no new years kiss for me ha ha this is the first year that’s happened ha ha yeah totally

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@_brittneybarnes

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@_brittneybarnes

[The Daily Show @TheDailyShow]

It's America's Failed Pandemic Response's Biggest Night: The Pandemmys.

Vote once, then vote again to make sure your vote counts: https://t.co/sY7sM1MyUe

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@kaylersaurus You on a real Schitt’s Creek kick recently😅 Regardless...

[Macy Finck @macyfinck]

Have you ever been near the doors of Lowder 113A during a class change? 300 people try to exit through a tiny corridor where 300 other people are standing and waiting to get in. Might as well be the Boom Boom Room

[mamrie hart @mametown]

Solely pronouncing ‘Covid’ like Alexis Rose says ‘David’ and it helps just the teensiest bit.

[Morgan Allison @The__Captn]

@kourtatwell Any excuse for some La Marca👌🏼😁