Mat Perlman

complete asshole, total motherfucker, absolute dickhead, raging prick, dog lover

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@JoeDaleySports @MsBehavior Thanks gents! ❤️

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

The only way I ever know if @Mon_Jayo is still alive is on twitter. So I guess I’m back for a bit.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@HarveysCanada Snow wrapped in maple syrup is a treat.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

The Young Bucks have such luxurious hair.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@boozeandbooks Priorities need to be shifted towards ALF!

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

I don’t care how big and tough you think you are. If you don’t get emotional over videos of dogs getting rescued, then your are fucking soulless and can get the fuck of my planet!

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@tiffanybor Open heart surgery is difficult but it can be done!

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

Why do none of these cold brew companies make a Vietnamese iced coffee? Did I just make someone rich? Fuck.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

Hi everyone. I’d like some gyoza. Ok cool.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@lyndseyerinx I don’t even know your dad but I’d get excited if he texted me that too!

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@tiffanybor What’s that? Is it on google?

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

Hi. It’s been over a year since I’ve been here. Did I miss anything?

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

I mostly came back to let you all know that @MonsterJam is my favourite Instagram account to follow. Maybe I’ll hang around and tell you all more things.

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@lexibrodeur30 Oh hey, you’re still a regular Jerry Seinfeld

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@bigballs204 You need at least 70 more light tubes. Also, when are we doing this?

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@WPWPro Cheeks vs Corleone rematch??!!!?

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@WPWPro How’d that go last time?

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@propagandhi @CdnChange I’d even watch fucking leafs games

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@propagandhi Chris Hannah for Coaches corner replacement! - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/pCIzxPjIWV via @CdnChange

[Mat Perlman @thefatmat]

@lyndseywallis She’s whooping his ass now.