Haley 🌒

the only profile I have

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

🫶

[hehehello @hehehellaur]

Okay today is my husbands birthday and he’s been at work the entire day and won’t be home until later tonight. I’m trying to get a bunch of strangers to send him $1 on cashapp and a bunch of birthday wishes so if you feel so inclined to participate in my deranged idea: $mmoral414

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

i am so excited I love everything about this please do not announce a tour due to there’s absolutely no possibility of affording that at this time 🫶 currently choosing which bills are and are not getting paid every check 🤪

[Taylor Swift @taylorswift13]

This Sunday. @vmas.

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

🥹 a little treat for me during these depressing times im living in rn

[Taylor Swift @taylorswift13]

This Sunday. @vmas.

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@FBI you know what we want you to do right

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

I should’ve never even glanced at the @taylorswift13 summer merch drop knowing good and well I don’t go back to work from maternity leave until the 30th 🥲 drop of my dreams btw

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@boburnham perhaps may I purchase inside merch once again (I finally gained weight now my shirts don’t fit me anymore but they were my main wardrobe fml)

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@McDonalds yeah hi let us add Big Mac sauce to whatever we want on the app. why do u hate me

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@NintendoAmerica nintendog

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@Publix yeah hi???? why have you taken away my cheerwine omg

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

anyways what an upgrade hi @progressive love u already 🫶

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

just saved nearly $200 per month by getting rid of @DirectAutoIns (mind you, I have been a customer of theirs for several years) and they’ve done nothing but hike up my rates every single year. bye

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

just saved nearly $200 per month by getting rid of @DirectAutoIns (mind you, I have been a customer of theirs for several years) and they’ve done nothing but hike up my rates every single year. bye

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

Ndwhdbsgssv

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@TatesBakeShop you have ruined my life

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

what in the entire fuck is this dude talking about lmao this generation won’t be having “inheritance” to even leave behind thanks to all the greedy lunatics in office

[Stephen Miller @StephenM]

Birthright citizenship means the children of illegal aliens can vote to tax your children and seize their inheritance.

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@CanadaDry please please please never discontinue my beloved fruit splash please i beg of you ITS BECOME A HOUSEHOLD STAPLE pls pls pls I already have to fight tooth and nail to buy them before they sell out as is
⚠️ DONT GET RID OF IT ⚠️

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

wow i am so glad i decided to be a cheapskate and buy the Walmart brand nutella and have a nice amount of it as a treat only to find it RIDDLED with sunflower oil (allergic) 😍😍😍😍😍 I wanted to be covered in hives thanks it was worth saving $1 😍😍😍😍😍

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

my dead grandma

[🌊Zero Dark Twenty-Nine 🌊🖋️ @herotimeszero]

Name something that's tougher than Trump.

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

how are u gonna tell your whole military this is some type of biblical apocalyptic war for Christ and then immediately blow up a fucking elementary school? we deserve whatever happens to us at this point

[Haley 🌒 @theoldhaley]

@Publix instead of the free bar cake or ice cream for birthdays can you please please please please gift me with a PUB SUB (or make it an option as well as the others) 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲😍