Jacob Glaser

parody account

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

It happened and we were there to see it. The wait's over, dad. Happy Father's Day. #GoCavs

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Fenway park I am inside of you (again)

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Fenway Park I am inside of you

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@PFTCommenter I’m telling Zac Taylor to see if Jed York will help design the Bengals rushing attack cause he’s shown that if he’s got a few Bucs in Ohio, he can take advantage of a weak box

[Polymarket @Polymarket]

JUST IN: 13 Penn State fraternity brothers charged with running a major cocaine trafficking ring, with some pledges allegedly forced to cut & package cocaine as part of their “indoctrination” into the frats.

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@BarstoolBigCat still nothing make @JetBlue atone for their sins

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@JetBlue flight out of TVC was cancelled and the next flight out is Wednesday. Called customer service and haven’t heard back after 2 hours. Fix this

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Yo @KirbySmartUGA I think he’s got another year of eligibility👀

[NBC News @NBCNews]

BREAKING: Tiger Woods was involved in a rollover car crash in Jupiter Island, Florida, authorities say. https://t.co/Pvqzlyw7h7

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Pigs in a blanket is the gentrification of the corn dog

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@DK_Assist You got it, DK🫡

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@PFTCommenter I’m sending Mrs Claus a bottle of Tide and a note to keep watch for challenge flags. Because if there was ever a week for her to be prepared for red laundry, this is it

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@JacobsFieldRBW Einar Diaz

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@MiserableMet My guy…

[MLB Deserve-To-Win-O-Meter @mlb_simulator]

How old should you be until you have a 50% chance of seeing your favorite team win the World Series?

If the MLB had perfect parity, you would have a 50% chance of seeing your team win the WS by age 20.

Big Market: 11-years-old
Small Market: 53-years-old

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@MossPicks 👀

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

“I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier”🎶

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

There are cathedrals everywhere for those with eyes to see them

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Amelia Earhart this Amelia Earhart that. I prefer my pilots know how to land #TEAMHARRIETQUIMBY

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@Browns trade for Patrick Mahomes you cowards

[The Spectator Index @spectatorindex]

BREAKING: Iranian state media claims there will be a surprise tonight that the 'world will remember for centuries'

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Next season of White Lotus at Put in Bay who says no?

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

Me showing my friends my TouchTunes queue at char bar tonight

[Jacob Glaser @uajag24]

@PFTCommenter Standing on the corner
Jameis Winston East Rutherford
Such a fine sight to see
Water landing my lord
Headed to La Guardia
Thank god for my boy Sully