emily 👽

who am I, hedwig? what am I

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

me: *slides @NASA $10* so.... how are the aliens. are they doing good
nasa: ...
me: *slides @NASA another $10* can u tell them to abduct me

[pat tobin @tastefactory]

Everything that has happened since the dawn of mankind has been leading to this

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

me @ 19 but with my older brother https://t.co/YKnwp6Le9w

[gary from teen mom @garyfromteenmom]

me at 16: leave me alone mom im an adult
me at 23: mom if u dont come to the dentist with me ill end my shit

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

thank you @NBC you may have my first born as payment for giving me back my will to live https://t.co/ttPxWMjhOX

[NBC Entertainment @nbc]

We got your SIX! #Brooklyn99 is officially coming to NBC!

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

I returned to twitter from the void in order to tweet this

[Josemartin @Icemanwithaplan]

Me in a lecture retaining 0 information

[Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen]

Jordan Peele: I quit writing Get Out twenty times before I finally finished it
Me, a wildly untalented hack: this is inspiring, the only obstacle to my success is follow through

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

it was so goooooood. such a breath of fresh air, since marvel movies (except ragnarok) started feeling p stale. also, killmonger is the most nuanced marvel villain ever imo

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

I'm in the cinema to see Black Panther this is gonna be gooood

[NBC Olympics & Paralympics @NBCOlympics]

Yuzuru Hanyu earns gold!

He defends his title in men's figure skating one month after returning from injury. #WinterOlympics https://t.co/fmMl0C4Amf

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

that was incredible Yuzuru Hanyu is a legend #FigureSkating

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

YESSSSSS

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

figure skating is so stressful to watch everyone's so good

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

Adam Rippon 👌👌👌#figureskating

[ellen @eyrudice]

can the good place come back with season 3, like right now?

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

it just had to rain on the night the moon's doin something cool. I'm gonna fight the sky

[emily 👽 @ussdiscover]

I just started watching one day at a time and whyyyyy did I wait this long. It makes my heart happy

[Taika Waititi @TaikaWaititi]

#AustraliaDay