width

he/him | certified big shot | doctor who's number 1 hater/defender

[𓀦 @swordgunlimited]

girls will say “I thought of that when I was 12” and then fall for negging from a guy that fucks the Mcchicken while it’s still warm

[/// 𝙰 𝙽 𝙾 𝙳 𝚈 𝙽 𝙴 /// ✇ @Vaporwave_07]

everyone who hates binface or finds him unfunny is a certified miserable twat there is nothing funnier than this guy tormenting the British political system while larping as a bin from another planet

[GorgeousFireMonkey @monkey22409]

@PolitlcsUK Count Binface taking off his mask to enter Parliament

[Daniel Pearson @DPearsonPHL]

Btw lalas supporting the current system is basically proof that it doesn’t work. Thierry Henry and Zlatan Ibrahimovic would never have had the money to pay for the American system. So we are stuck with players like Lalas and Pulisic as a result of this exclusion.

[Count Binface @CountBinface]

Labour, Tories, Lib Dems and Greens: I demand you stand down in Clacton. I will be a unity candidate and pledge to build at least one affordable house.

Nigel Farage says he wants The People versus the Establishment. So be it.

Leave him to me.

[Zack Polanski @ZackPolanski]

Nigel Farage is a grifter. He always has been and he's continuing to grift.

He knew he was heading towards a byelection anyway so has pulled the trigger early.

The people Vs the establishment?! Reform are literally part of the establishment.

[Brooks Otterlake @i_zzzzzz]

They should put more wearable tech on the referee. He should be encrusted with devices

[josh snares @josh_snares]

i’d rather die than engage with dr who twitter discourse ever again

[Daniel Austin @_Dan_Austin]

Just to be clear, then. FIFA:

1) can't possibly intervene when Iran are forced to move, a referee is denied a visa, or fans are barred from the USA

2) can absolutely intervene when a decision goes against the USA that Donald Trump doesn't like

Smashing. All know where we stand

[Ross Sayers @Sayers33]

Colleague: *sees me yawning* were you up watching that ridiculousness last night too

Me: *who stayed up watching Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol on Film4+1* you know it

[charlie @StyledApe]

It sucks that a womanizer is what you call a man that charms women and not what you call the new weapon I invented

[width @Wilde_Rides]

sky arts is such a baller channel

[I eat short people @UnderwearStain]

Farted so hard while driving it blew the entire undercarriage of my car off so now i have to flinstones this bitch

[Hater Central @TheHateCentral]

Vozinha vs Cristiano Ronaldo at 2026 WC:

2 Dribbles 0 Dribbles
198 Touches 119 Touches
4/4 Ground Duels 4/7 Ground Duels

LEGENDS. 🐐✨

[Bashy McPaedel @BashyMc1]

Love how they’re reporting this like it’s a scandal and us kebab scruffs are just buzzing there’s some form of animal meat in it.

[Quentin “The Knight” Shadowflare @DonnyJenkins67]

I met this girl at a swim up bar once and we both got so drunk I was borderline just playing wit the pussy in front of everyone.
#oops
#sorrytothoseinvolved

[steve @unkatron]

I’ve shot ropes in places you wouldn’t hang yourself with one

[ozzy @WRATH0FTH3LAMB]

all timer post to me

[broti gupta @BrotiGupta]

in a porn parody of toy story, probably called "sex toy story" (not a surprising title) you wouldn't have to rename woody or buzz. but that's not a reason to make it

[Liberite 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 @brownliberite]

In Britain, there is an ancient power the PM has which allows for anything to happen no questions asked but it's just used to increase tuition fees periodically and let pubs stay open during world cups