Marcus

Do well so that you can do good. Be in the world , but not of the world.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@SkylarSkye3 I spent a whole summer there. It was fine.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool Heck, that depiction is still better than many. Many modern marriages don’t involve that much direct communication. Instead often when one isn’t happy they don’t say anything, or if they do the other dismisses it, and resentment builds and they cheat or do something else toxic.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool I’ll take fun and stable.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@Oklahoma_Brave Very fair take.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@marriedmn Oops

[Trey & Lea's Stronger Marriages @StrongMarriage5]

A WIFE'S WORDS TO US RECENTLY: "In my marriage when I'm regularly having sex with my husband, I find that he's more open, he communicates better, he serves me and he goes out of his way to meet my needs. AND, it’s not because he feels obligated … but it's because he feels closely connected to me when we regularly make love. WHY would I not want all this in my marriage?

US: Well said. I’m glad you get it, because many don’t.

(FYI: This was from a lady who was in a pretty healthy marriage)

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@AdamMGrant It’s not the success itself that’s the threat.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool Pendulum swung too far the other way.

[GYATA BA🦁 🇬🇭🇬🇧 @Gyata_Ba_]

US military unashamedly praising Jesus. 😊❤️🇺🇲🇺🇲

[Hereafter @idyllicmusing]

Increasing sexual frequency in a regular relationship from once a month to once a week delivers a happiness boost equivalent to the happiness gain from a roughly $50,000 annual salary raise.

More sex = monotonically higher happiness: The effect got larger with frequency. Sex 2–3 times a month, weekly, 2–3 times a week, and 4+ times a week all showed positive associations relative to no sex or very rare sex. Having sex at least 4 times a week was linked to a happiness increase roughly half the size of the marriage effect on happiness.

The happiness-maximizing number of sexual partners in the previous year was calculated as one. Zero partners or multiple partners both correlated with LOWER happiness than monogamous frequency with a single partner.

Money does not buy more sex or more partners. Higher family income had essentially zero correlation with sexual frequency or number of partners. Rich and poor Americans reported very similar sex lives. (This was one of the findings that surprised the researchers.)

Married people had significantly more sex than single, divorced, widowed, or separated people. Roughly 90% of married respondents reported exactly one partner in the past year. Marriage itself had one of the LARGEST positive coefficients in the happiness equations.

Typical American frequency was modest. The median person had sex 2–3 times a month. About 25% reported no sex in the previous year (higher among older women). Only about 7% reported 4+ times a week.

Paying for sex or having extramarital sex was associated with LOWER happiness. Homosexuality had no statistically significant effect on happiness in their equations. Highly educated women tended to have fewer partners.

In a time of declining marriage rates, falling sexual frequency among young adults, rising loneliness, and cultural messaging that endless novelty and “options” are the path to fulfillment, the data points the other way. The people reporting the HIGHEST happiness were disproportionately those having consistent sex with exactly one partner.

* This is a correlational pattern across 16,000+ people.

[Attraction Matriarch @TheXMatriarch @TheXMatriarch]

Marriage is not sustained by chemistry alone. It is sustained by duty, forgiveness, self-control, tenderness, and the refusal to let temporary hardship destroy permanent vows.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@Thedrivenman Correct.

[Trey & Lea's Stronger Marriages @StrongMarriage5]

3 RULES FOR A LONG MARRIAGE:

1. Never make your spouse feel unwanted.

2. No matter how hard things get, never cheat.

3. Always have your spouse's back through good and bad times.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool Love it. You say the best, most inspiring things.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@Kekius_Sage Some people don’t have hearts so they don’t know what love is.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool My ex hasn’t had a job in over 2 years. I thought it’d be fair for her to take over more of the household duties. I still had to plan the meals if we were going to eat anything besides basically meatloaf. She never learned how to make more than four or so things. She didn’t care.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@MatrixDebrief @Oilfield_Rando Our food supply

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

“Marriage isn’t maintained by feelings.”

Perfectly said.

[Gia Macool @GiaMMacool]

One of the biggest misconceptions about marriage is believing that if a wife doesn't want sex, she must not be attracted to her husband.

Sometimes that's true.

But often, it isn't.

Many men (and women) work hard to stay attractive while they're single.

They have fewer responsibilities.

They stay in shape.

They flirt.

They create novelty.

They put effort into attraction.

Then marriage, kids, and life happen.

They gain weight.

They stop dating their spouse.

The pursuit disappears because they think, "I'm married now."

That's no different than the person who says, "I'll never get married."

Both come from people who don't want to do the work.

Marriage exposes character.

On the other side, pregnancy and childbirth can affect a woman's mind, hormones and libido.

Add stress, exhaustion, and raising children, and desire often drops even more.

Men and women also respond to stress differently.

Many men want sex to relieve stress.

Many women need stress reduced before they desire sex.

A healthy marriage requires both people to own that reality.

A husband should never stop pursuing his wife.

A wife should nurture intimacy and communicate her needs.

The internet loves shortsighted complaints.

That's why the internet lies about marriage.

Marriage isn't maintained by feelings.

It's built by two imperfect people choosing each other, over and over again.

[Gia Macool @GiaMMacool]

I’ve been with my husband since 2000, so I’ve been married long enough to say this:

Your husband can’t read your mind. 

If you expect him to “just know” and your feelings get hurt, you’re the one with the problem, not him. 

Second, a man who feels respected and knows he has a ride-or-die woman by his side will literally lay down his life for her. 

Men thrive where they feel honored, appreciated, and believed in.

A husband who feels constantly disrespected and criticized will eventually stop trying. 

So if you’re always saying, “My husband isn’t consistent,” or “He keeps dropping the ball,” ask yourself if he feels respected in his own home.

I’ve watched this happen over and over again, and it’s avoidable.

Marriage is about what you are planting every single day. 

Every word, 

every reaction, 

every act of kindness or criticism is a seed. 

Water the seeds you want to grow.

Lastly, the environment in your home is largely dependent on the wife 

That doesn’t mean your husband isn’t responsible for his own actions. 

It means a woman has incredible influence over her home. 

The way she speaks to her husband, honors him, and responds to him in the small moments is powerful.

Many women think that’s oppression but it’s actually true influence. 

And when we understand that, it becomes empowerment because we realize our daily choices have the power to shape our marriage.

[Marcus @wtxguy4real]

@GiaMMacool Some spouses/partners are always waiting for the other spouse to fix their problems first. That game will never work. Each partner needs to be accountable and step up.