Andrew Porrello

There’s never a bad time for a Slurpee

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@jimmykimmel @ALSA_Nevada @LasVegasLocally @VitalVegas

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@AviatorsLV It’ll be one heck of a 4th of July celebration 💥

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@PorrelloSarah @sarahhelizz

[Sarah Porrello @sarahhelizz]

When the flight attendants hit that “locate your nearest exit.. keeping in mind, it might be BEHIND you”

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@Frishy9 Atrophy is wilddd 🤯

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@INTERIORPORN1 @sydbeckk you down?

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@budweiserusa @MatthewPalmer96 imagine sitting in these and cracking open a few cold ones in the backyard #RedWhiteAndBuds #sweepstakes

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@Frishy9 I’m also still waiting for the kid that reveals what college he’s committing to by using one of the Instagram filters

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

I’ve got an idea for the LDS church. Hear me out: what if instead of getting your mission call in the mail you just use one of the Instagram filters that puts a little bubble over your head and flashes a bunch of different cities. Wherever it stops is where you’re called to serve

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@Frishy9 Can you imagine the anticipation as you’re sitting there watching cities from all around the world flash by

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@lasvegastammie Exactly!

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

There really should be a college class on office bathroom etiquette 🚽

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@Frishy9 The Beckham Experiment

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@ComedyWorksLV When your son asks you why he has to study...show him this

When your daughter asks you why she has to study...show her this

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

only Centennial kids would understand what it’s like to walk in and see mr. palumbo as a sub

[Carley Bachmeier @CarleyyBachh]

only shadle kids would understand what it’s like to walk in and see ms caterson as a sub

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@sarahhelizz I see you retweeted this. I know you’re talking about Joey, right??

[susie @thenames_susan]

Momma ain't raise no bitch and even if she did.... it's my brother

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

4 goals in a 53 minute span! Go on @dmusovski

[SK Holdings @SKholdings_]

FULLTIME

Goals by @dmusovski in the 4th, 27th, 51st, and 57th minutes help us defeat @RealMonarchs 4-0!

Well done lads 👏

#WasatchWinterCup | #AllForOurCity

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@sarahhelizz ~only to never to be heard from again~

[Eric Wynalda @EricWynalda]

@Frishy9 you would have been the best player at the MLS combine today - IMO - FYI

[Andrew Porrello @youcancallmeAP]

@sarahhelizz You’ve clearly been away at school for awhile because that’s nowhere close to my writing...