z🐸l🐸ft nightmare

Dude, nice hole. (she/her)

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

to express my love for darwin’s theory I will never be visiting the doctor or hospital again. I would like to be naturally selected.

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

how is it even legal for deodorants to claim they last 48 hours. they dont.

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

@TeachanTravel1 you are also physically incapable of setting boundaries with people?

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

carrie bradshaw is the most frustrating character in television history

[pj @pjayevans]

cars have windows and can move. houses have windows and can’t move. so it’s not the windows that make the car go, it’s something else entirely

[Frankie Muniz @frankiemuniz]

I have about 4 dreams a week that I get shot in. Last night, I could actually feel the burn of the bullets as they entered my chest & heart.

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

his window-lookin perch

[ppigg @s4m31p4n]

Cats be like I need to look out the window about this

[Marcus @MCAngulo]

This thread is @jasminericegirl masterpiece. Perfectly crafted, better than any best picture nominee at the oscars this year. No notes 11/10

[witch sea urchin 𓂃 ོ☼𓂃 @rissaoffline]

i’m not like other girls my brain made a mashup of sorry by madonna and the scooby doo theme song and is forcing me to listen to it. i am begging to be like other girls

[Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen]

the eyes of a dog who knows he looks goofy

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

@lilydont this happened like 3 times in the 5 years i was a cashier at a grocery store in a small town. thankfully i was never the one to clean it

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

@Kittenfish817 either of the green ones !

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

bro what is going on at twitter

[z🐸l🐸ft nightmare @zoloft101]

imagine: a love island style reality show but just have a group of people of assorted sexualities.

[tytacobell @tytacobell]

Got in a fender bender today