Citrus Simulacrum

Professional Faggot™|🏳️‍⚧️ (💉-12/5/25)|🇵🇹|Immortal as of April 7th 2026

[Citrus Simulacrum @CitruSimulacrum]

Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider and girls go to Venus because some of us have a penis

[I eat short people @UnderwearStain]

Farted so hot it managed to laminate 12 sheets of paper

[Old Man Rattle @oldrattle_]

farting so loud at petsmart that the parakeets start acting up

[LiterallyDrew @LiteralyDrew]

Mario games: save the princess
Wario games:

[faget83629031852 @faget9261530128]

im shooting up heroin with a mechanical pencil

[Thomas White @len0killer]

My uncle performed the first Minion autopsy out near Marietta. Year was ‘89. Thick, thick skin, like a boar’s. Downstairs was all cloaca. Kevin still visits the grave

[paddle @ipaddlearound]

dont cry becasue its over, Attack. Attack wverythjng around you. do spin attacks and hurt things

[M a t t ™️ @deepdownderp]

@ShortHairedCat

[evil sinister fucking komodo dragon (bio/paleoomf) @GarlotsBack]

“Siri call my friends”

“No friends found”

“I’m sorry, Siri call my pawns”

“Calling 700 walruses”

“Wait what the fuck Siri that’s not what I said”

“Ooooouuuughhhhfhgfhhh”

[frankie steins gay uncle @ewkewpid]

chopped my hair off and one of my balding customers said he’s refusing to tip me until it grows back so I said im refusing to serve him until his hair grows period and now I have a meeting with my manager tomorrow

[Vivian @suchnerve]

Maybe gay people were originally called “fruity” because without gay marriage, they… cantaloupe

[👼 @xtsygirll]

i knew from a young age i was weird and unfixable

[JoëlMatipFanClub @jmatipfanclub]

You’re just blatantly not me nan

[frick @gofrickurself]

What are your intentions with my balls

[✨KADK9💫 @PossiblyK9]

do uou like my season s tierlist

[vivi @mooncatvivi]

hey man what’s up with the lack of you know, light in your eyes

[Egg @BoiledEggington]

Was on the bus and this nigga skipped my stop and when I told him he just said "I don't gaf, I can kill us all right now"

[lilac 呂 | (7/10 slots comms open! 🎉) @rairakkyue]

HELLO WHAT IS THIS

[girlboss mageboss guildboss boss boss sacha @thugmajesty7]

the title of this video sounds like it was written in minionese lol