Colette Des Georges

I made my Twitter account long, long before I was a respectable professional.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

Sending people voice memos in response to their text is a micro aggression.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

I think it’s so funny when people say “I turn into a pumpkin,” when they want to go home early at night, because according to Cinderella cannon that would make them the carriage.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@kosherchad @meat You heard the man @meat you can only use it for food that is terrible for you and you hate

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

I once had a client (I worked at a PR firm at the time) start flossing in the middle of an in-person meeting, mid-interview. I will treasure the look of frozen shock on my boss's face for the rest of my life.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

To be clear tho, I don’t care. I for one welcome our chemical overlords, as long as they get rid of my wrinkles.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

The front of every women’s toiletry product: “Made with honey <3 almond <3 and fresh roses <3”

The back: “Ingredients: Glycerin, petroleum, yellow 5763, lead…”

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@DJSpacecamp @kevinleeme Yasss

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@JoshDance @kevinleeme Lol I came here to write Brandon Sanderson. I feel like I’ve spent my entire year in the Cosmere

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@DovKadin God bless the rooty tooty fresh n��� fruity.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

Sometimes I truly cannot with the names of these Dutch neighborhoods.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@josh_ag Solid eight minutes

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

It’s funny how we say “beelining” to mean straight, when really bees’ lines are like:
. .
. . . .
. . . .
. . . . . . . .
.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

Cute how we call a business a “company” as if we’re just having people over for dinner and using the nice plates and not serving a blood-sucking capitalist agenda.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

Wow so many people on the internet have their phones set on dungeons and dragons.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@lorakolodny I have notifications I can’t clear (even after reading/clicking on them all), which is new. My OCD does not approve

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@DJSpacecamp Thank you. 👏🏼

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

I love how when Brits tell you you’re supposed to do something they say “meant to” as if there were an ancient prophesy that you would someday rinse your jars before putting them in the recycling.

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@joelipper FYL

[Colette Des Georges @ColetteorCoco]

@joelipper Egregious lol