Yes my name is Dallas

Wine Smartypants. Sucky Blogger. Transgender. Howay the Lads.

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

When I lived as a man, my name was avante garde, it spoke to me being different in a good way.

As I was getting dressed for work today, it hit me that, in the world of women, Dallas is a stripper name.

[ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ʀɪᴄᴇ (ʜᴇ/ʜɪᴍ/ʏ’ᴀʟʟ) @IQuitWriting]

If ‘Live, Laugh, Love’ were a store bought fruit salad ‘laugh’ would be pineapple, ‘love’ would be the single grape, and ‘live’ would all the fucking cantaloupe and honeydew melon.

[tara shoe @tarashoe]

a proper response to girl calling "amy?" in ladies bathroom wouldve been silence. but instead i yelled YOU WON'T FIND YOUR PRECIOUS AMY HERE

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

Y’all remember when that dude lied about his video game having legs?

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

@malythe85 Under appreciated tweet right here

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

Never before have I felt so understood by a company as I am by Pizza. Large

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

Life is way to much Hakuna and not nearly enough Matata.

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

@buglesofficial: [Exist]

Me:

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

"Pics or it didn't happen" was the OG BeReal

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

Shout out to the, like, three straight girls that can say they were in a lesbian relationship because of me.

[Fin Taylor @FinTaylorcomedy]

As the NFL is in London, they asked me to go on Good Morning Football yesterday even though I’ve never watched NFL in my life.

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

Facebook is a fucking shanty town.

[The Notorious B.E.V. 🌈 @blade_funner]

[ME ON ANTIQUES ROADSHOW]

“Just tell me what it’s fucking worth.”

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

@IQuitWriting I remember my excitement and shouting “I know that guy!” to an empty room when you viraled.

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

you can refer to brushing your teeth as ‘cleaning my skeleton’ and there isn’t a lawyer in the world that can stop you

[Yes my name is Dallas @DallasBegnaud]

@NoTheOtherJohn Are we humans or are we dancers?

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

I know the news is all about the Queen but today is also the anniversary of one of the biggest events in modern history - Ted Cruz cranking his hog to a porn tweet on 9/11

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

having a king is going to take some getting used to. we’re used to our monarch moving as far as they want in any direction but now it’s just one square at a time. much higher chance of being killed by a horse