Laurie Yohe

In everything we do, our own thoughts can help us succeed, or they can help us fail. Maintain a positive attitude.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

Women know exactly what they want until the second they have to choose.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

On the other hand... You have different fingers.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

'Are you as bored as I am?' Makes sense even when you read it backwards...

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

My wife does bird imitations. She always watches me like hawk.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

That awkward moment when you remember something funny, and can't stop smiling like an idiot..

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

[Lisa Norris @pavlinl1]

It's sad when dudes cheat on their beautiful girlfriends with baby monkeys, hamsters, guppies, turtles, and every zoo animal you can name.

[ᅠᅠElon Mụsk @BrankovSakerdon]

You don't know something? Google it. You don't know someone? Facebook it. You don't find something? MOM!

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

A jealous woman does better research than FBI

[Donna Payne @butyrskikhdari1]

Kicking ice cubes under the fridge when they hit the floor.

[Faye Osborne @FilimonRychik]

Whenever someone rings the doorbell, my dog always assumes it's for him.

[Kimberley Rose @ichernizov]

The only "B" word you should call a girl is beautiful, bitches love being called beautiful.

[Terri Reichard @bredikhinpolik1]

Bitches be dark as 11:59, talking 'bout they mixed. Mixed with what? Dirt and oil?

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

"You actually have friends...?" "Yeah bro, all 10 seasons on DVD!"

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

"Only when I think of all the people who've died & how they must have us seriously outnumbered...G'night!"

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

That awesome moment when the whole class laughed at what you said, so you just sit there like a boss.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

I would go through many things for you. Let's start with your bank account.

[Leigh Brown @2016Staneva]

This is how my week goes mooooooooooooonday.. tuuuuuuuuuuuuesday.. weeeeeeeeeeednesday... thuuuuuuuuuuursday.. fridaysaturdaysunday.

[Laurie Yohe @GelsemMega]

Admit it, we all have that one person that you just wanna slap across the face.