Lady of house Snacks

Elegant as a MF.

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

Me doing laundry:

-Pours detergent

-Pours fabric softener

-Switches machine on

-Turns knob to large load <giggles>

-start

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@KaylaChowShow If you put your ear up to it, you can hear the ocean…

[TimTam🍫 @CandymanTimTam]

Americans would sell their first born for a booth and a restaurant

[boo-boo-ɾɑҍҍíԵ @StrangerTings5]

Do you think centipedes have a bad horror movie called "The Centipede Human"?

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@stewiecoffee Back atchuuuuu!

[Melissa Turkington @Leftovers_Movie]

I must find her.

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@Girl15Gone Ohhh…. Ok, so I have been having him point the fan on my face to send an ever so slight breeze through my hair while I suck him off. Ya know, Beyoncé or Mariah style… I didn’t know I was supposed to be TRYING 🤣🤣

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@stewiecoffee Had to pick up my pants from across the room… they shot right off my legs at this delicious sight

[Passionate_Warrior_777 @SadWarrior_777_]

I hate uncertainty..
I hate it.

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@dakarrier The look great!!! Solid choice

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@thexybeatht Cello

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@manda_tee1 @AllanForsyth I can only agree!!

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

🏆🏆Hump Day/Bump Day🏆🏆
@DayBump Judges Pick by @KKAlwaysSays

@AllanForsyth is my winner of this week’s Hump Day/Bump Day tweet call. Congratulations!

TL crawl will begin shortly!

Winning Tweet:

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

My attempt to infiltrate a dance troupe was thwarted by their two-step authentication.

[Lady of house Snacks @KKAlwaysSays]

@AllanForsyth @DayBump Heck yes!!! Congrats my friend, you’re a rockstar 😎👊🏼

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

Car horns sound either like Colin Firth or Samuel L Jackson saying "excuse me", depending on how hard you press them.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

A busy convenience store is anything but.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

A think tank isn't a similar thing to a smart car, and this is why I find the English language confusing.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

Her: Reverse cowgirl is my favourite sexual position.

Me: *not having a clue about anything other than missionary* Yeah, er, girl cow is my favourite position too.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

I ❤️ internal organs.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

Bought a dog whistle a month ago. Stupid animal hasn't learnt to blow it yet.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

Luke Shaw's name sounds like an excitable sailor seeing land for the first time in a while.

[Daft Pun @AllanForsyth]

Took the road less travelled after telling the wife that we didn't need to stop and ask for directions.