@AimTrue7@DrBobBeare It's all maintenance. Sometimes when I realize that there is no cure, therein lies the key to freedom. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
This the capstone of step 8. Don't seek forgiveness bc it will help you. Seek it to grant freedom to the other person to do what they need to do. The ego must die.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
I did this even before I discovered the 12 steps. I had stolen a weight belt from my high school. Years later I went back with a new belt & extra $. It was radically freeing.
@RDelaney@DrBobBeare There is a great Tool song that illustrates why some can't break the cycle.
"Do unto you now
What has been done to me
Do unto you now
What has been done"
The cycle must be broken.
@PureLifeMin I think it's true but it also can be matched with a constant walk in the spirit. I think the allergy is there to remind me how weak I am without God. I need Him constantly. And if I think I've got it figured out and turn from God, I know there is a ditch of death waiting for me.
Step 7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
https://t.co/swl8dEGGeY
Step 6: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
When we are not ready we won't recover. But just because we stay in addiction does not mean we can't recover. It's a choice that often comes after much preparation.
Rock bottoms are preparation.
Step 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Honesty is aided and abetted by accountability. Addiction lurks in the shadows. This is true of physical, psychological, and spiritual shadows.
Relapse is a part of recovery. Don't let it be an excuse to stay there. Recovery takes a heart, soul, and mind. Relapse takes excuse and everything else it can suck from your life. Recovery is the goal. Don't let relapse take that from you.
There is a temptation to avoid looking at our bad behavior for the necessary lessons. But nothing is more necessary for sobriety than learning from failure. We work without making much progress when we refuse to look for lessons. Don't live in the past but learn from it.
@libsoftiktok When you don't have a knowledge of history or an understanding of the meaning of words and instead project your unmet emotional needs onto everyone else. If you are anti-family, you are anti-human.
Step 4: "We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
We we want to put everything on the table. We want to find patterns more so than root causes. Find the pattern, trace it back. We want to be radically honest. Accountability starts with an honest look in.
@SLibertatis@stretchyWombat Amen. We can be so busy trying to be good that we begin to distance ourselves from those whose fruits we may not like. But we are not all at the same point in our journeys. Unfortunately, I see this a lot on X. There seems to be a lot of bad faith judgement btwn members.
Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. We don't wait for perfection. We make a decision to trust a power greater than ourselves. Our knowledge is always limited. But we work with what we have. And then we begin.
I found out how to rid my heart of resentment.
How should that person have acted? What should they have said?
Exactly as they acted. Exactly what they said
“When you love someone, you love the person as they are, and not as you'd like them to be.” Leo Tolstoy