As Seen On TV

'I ''love'' my husband.' (Caliborn retching violently in the background) || Mun is a minor. || Friendly RP account, DMs open! || Proshitters fuck off.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

You were supposed to break the cycle...

[Mangaka Cyberbro @techopped]

Got lost at sea. (Spent too long in the shower.)

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

GIVE THE MAN. HIS FUCKING UPPIES.

[☥ @fleshvampyr]

amanda…..i want uppies *grabby hands*

[ً @kreophagos]

in the end, meat is meat.

[𝔩𝔞𝔡𝔶 𝔦𝔠𝔞𝔯𝔲𝔰. @starpoembot]

I feel this little hum behind my sternum when you tell me you don’t love me.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

@brainghostdstri Dude, I know exactly what you mean.

The second I woke up in this God-forsaken timeline, I swear to fuck, I was hit with every rare disease known to man.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

No one warned you about the stairs, bro?

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

@chapbotenglish Darn tootin'.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

I need to start talking like a cowboy immediately.

[jakebot english! @chapbotenglish]

&- hearing mr. dietrich unironically say “what in fuckin tarnation are y’all doin.” to mr david and ms roxanne gave me whiplash.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

He may look harmless, but hubris will be your downfall.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

His face says, "Oh shit."

But really, he's thinking, "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine." Because he KNOWS how people on the internet are about animals.

This is a man of dangerous capability. He mocks your threats in secret.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

@chapbotenglish Damn skippy.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

Every time I come back, the TL seems to be deader.

This is why I don't post.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

Yo, this kicks unreasonable amounts of ass.

[||/S.MOTHS|| Clown Hell @SarcasticMoths]

BATTER DIRK I HAVENT DRAWN YOU IN LIKE A FUCKING YEAR.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

Oh, yeah. Merry Christmas, by the way.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

I'm not sure, but I almost went through a Charles Dickens nightmare of my own, so I feel like I should be exempt.

Apparently the AR was the standin for my dead business partner.

[𝓝𝓮𝔀𝓼 Dan Scavino Jr.🇺🇸🦅 @DanScavinoTNews]

I’m bored….if you were visited by 3 ghost for Christmas who would you want them to be? Lol

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

IT IS TRULY UNPARALLELED IN ITS THOUGHTFULNESS. AS HE SHARES THIS ACCOUNT. I WILL NOT DISCLOSE IT. BUT YOU WILL KNOW. COME "CHRIS MASS."

ALSO WHO THE FUCK IS CHRIS. I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO FIND INFORMATION ABOUT HIM OR WHAT HE HAS TO DO WITH THE HOLIDAY. PLEASE ADVISE.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

THIS IN MIND. I HAVE BEEN STUDYING THE HUMAN HOLIDAY. "CHRIS MASS." IT IS FAST APPROACHING. IT APPEARS TO BE A HOLIDAY BASED. ENTIRELY AROUND GIFTS. AND THREATENING DEATH. UPON THOSE WHO DO NOT PROCURE YOU "FIGGY PUDDING."

I HAVE PROCURED. I THINK. THE ULTIMATE GIFT.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

DIRK ONCE TALKED TO HIMSELF ABOUT HORSES FOR A FULL FUCKING HOUR. HAD A FULL ON. BACK AND FORTH CONVERSATION.

I ASKED HIM. DIRK. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. HE SAID NOBODY ASKED SO HE "INFO DUMPED" TO HIMSELF.

THIS. THIS IS WHAT A REAL MAN IS. THIS IS WHAT I MARRIED HIM FOR.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

DIRK ONCE TALKED TO HIMSELF ABOUT HORSES FOR A FULL FUCKING HOUR. HAD A FULL ON. BACK AND FORTH CONVERSATION.

I ASKED HIM. DIRK. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING. HE SAID NOBODY ASKED SO HE "INFO DUMPED" TO HIMSELF.

THIS. THIS IS WHAT A REAL MAN IS. THIS IS WHAT I MARRIED HIM FOR.

[As Seen On TV @SincerelyDirkuu]

THIRDED.

[YAOI KING. @THETUMULTUOUS]

HATRED. MALICE, EVEN.